This video is not safe for work. It opens with the lines, "Not everyone likes metal. F*CK THEM!" It is, however, quite humorous. And reminiscent of a former fellow resident.
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
A wonderful memory sullied...
In the winter of 1992-93, I was a senior at Ramstein American High School, located on the premises of Ramstein Air Force Base and a short drive from the German town of Landstuhl. I was also the president of RAHS' chapter of the National Honor Society.
Like many NHS chapters, we chose a service project to give back to our community. Our project that winter was to remodel the Family Waiting Room for the Intensive Care Unit at what was at the time known as Landstuhl Army Regional Medical Center (LARMC). It has since dropped the "Army" from its title.
At the time, Landstuhl was lesser known than its cousin to the north, the Wiesbaden military hospital. For any who may remember, the US hostages taken during the Iranian Revolution were flown to and treated at Wiesbaden following their release in 1981. Partly as a result of not being well-known (and also because the Army is just generally bad at facilities upkeep, a truth brought home by the appalling conditions at Walter Reed Army Hospital), several facilities within LARMC were in disrepair.
The project came out of a tour of Landstuhl the NHS took as it was considering potential service projects. During our tour, I noticed family members sleeping in a waiting room for the Intensive Care Unit (ICU). I also noticed that the room in which they slept was enclosed by stained walls covered in peeling paint, and filled with furniture that was broken and/or stained and so small and uncomfortable as to make sleeping (or even sitting for long periods of time) deeply uncomfortable, if not impossible. The room and its furniture clearly had not been updated in decades.
I was appalled, and so were my classmates. We could not imagine that family members sitting vigil, awaiting word of the fate of a loved one fighting for his or her life, were forced to endure such awfulness in an already terrible situation.
Back at RAHS, we made a quick decision to make the renovation of that Family Waiting Room our Winter/Spring Service Project.
Over several snowy days in December 1992/January 1993, we raised money for funding, scraped and painted walls, scrapped the old furniture, and hunted down and purchased new sofas and recliners that would make sleeping and/or sitting much more palatable. When we were done, that Family Waiting Room looked like new. I was prouder then of that service project than of any individual academic or athletic achievement.
For many years, the memory of that service project has been one of my most fond memories. As Landstuhl has received frequent mention in the press as the primary treatment facility for veterans wounded grievously in Afghanistan and Iraq, I have recalled my experience at Landstuhl, glad that we may have made families a little more comfortable -- and I have wondered whether that facility, getting much more use now than then, is in need of another renovation.
Then, in the last week, I've been sickened by the use of Landstuhl and its wounded residents as a political football by the McCain campaign. Whatever you think of the wisdom of the move (I think he should have gone), Barack Obama and his campaign made a good-faith effort to avoid politicizing the facility by not going when he and his campaign perceived that the trip to visit wounded soldiers at Landstuhl might be politicized.
Now, John McCain, in a dishonest, disingenuous ad, and with words used during campaign stops, is using Landstuhl and its wounded veterans for shallow, temporary political advantage. It is deeply inappropriate and it makes me nauseous.
It shocks me that a military veteran and former POW, who knows and understands intimately the sacrifices endured by wounded veterans, would think for one moment of using them as part of a political ploy. His willingness to do so, and in fact his campaign's insistence on continuing to doing so in the face of evidence contradicting his charge (see linked article above), is craven. It demonstrates that he values the short-term political value of pasting his opponent with a tag of "military-hating liberal" more than he does the concept of honoring the sacrifice of wounded veterans by keeping them off the political playing field. In so doing, he has proven that he is unfit for the highest office in the land.
He has clearly lost himself in his desperation to be president. It's sickening, and it's sad. And though I was considering it, I will no longer consider voting for John McCain. He has sullied my memories, sullied his campaign, and sullied himself with this disgusting gambit. He should be ashamed of himself. I pray only that the American public sees this shameful ploy for what it is and, if he continues it, rejects it soundly in November. Pathetic.
Like many NHS chapters, we chose a service project to give back to our community. Our project that winter was to remodel the Family Waiting Room for the Intensive Care Unit at what was at the time known as Landstuhl Army Regional Medical Center (LARMC). It has since dropped the "Army" from its title.
At the time, Landstuhl was lesser known than its cousin to the north, the Wiesbaden military hospital. For any who may remember, the US hostages taken during the Iranian Revolution were flown to and treated at Wiesbaden following their release in 1981. Partly as a result of not being well-known (and also because the Army is just generally bad at facilities upkeep, a truth brought home by the appalling conditions at Walter Reed Army Hospital), several facilities within LARMC were in disrepair.
The project came out of a tour of Landstuhl the NHS took as it was considering potential service projects. During our tour, I noticed family members sleeping in a waiting room for the Intensive Care Unit (ICU). I also noticed that the room in which they slept was enclosed by stained walls covered in peeling paint, and filled with furniture that was broken and/or stained and so small and uncomfortable as to make sleeping (or even sitting for long periods of time) deeply uncomfortable, if not impossible. The room and its furniture clearly had not been updated in decades.
I was appalled, and so were my classmates. We could not imagine that family members sitting vigil, awaiting word of the fate of a loved one fighting for his or her life, were forced to endure such awfulness in an already terrible situation.
Back at RAHS, we made a quick decision to make the renovation of that Family Waiting Room our Winter/Spring Service Project.
Over several snowy days in December 1992/January 1993, we raised money for funding, scraped and painted walls, scrapped the old furniture, and hunted down and purchased new sofas and recliners that would make sleeping and/or sitting much more palatable. When we were done, that Family Waiting Room looked like new. I was prouder then of that service project than of any individual academic or athletic achievement.
For many years, the memory of that service project has been one of my most fond memories. As Landstuhl has received frequent mention in the press as the primary treatment facility for veterans wounded grievously in Afghanistan and Iraq, I have recalled my experience at Landstuhl, glad that we may have made families a little more comfortable -- and I have wondered whether that facility, getting much more use now than then, is in need of another renovation.
Then, in the last week, I've been sickened by the use of Landstuhl and its wounded residents as a political football by the McCain campaign. Whatever you think of the wisdom of the move (I think he should have gone), Barack Obama and his campaign made a good-faith effort to avoid politicizing the facility by not going when he and his campaign perceived that the trip to visit wounded soldiers at Landstuhl might be politicized.
Now, John McCain, in a dishonest, disingenuous ad, and with words used during campaign stops, is using Landstuhl and its wounded veterans for shallow, temporary political advantage. It is deeply inappropriate and it makes me nauseous.
It shocks me that a military veteran and former POW, who knows and understands intimately the sacrifices endured by wounded veterans, would think for one moment of using them as part of a political ploy. His willingness to do so, and in fact his campaign's insistence on continuing to doing so in the face of evidence contradicting his charge (see linked article above), is craven. It demonstrates that he values the short-term political value of pasting his opponent with a tag of "military-hating liberal" more than he does the concept of honoring the sacrifice of wounded veterans by keeping them off the political playing field. In so doing, he has proven that he is unfit for the highest office in the land.
He has clearly lost himself in his desperation to be president. It's sickening, and it's sad. And though I was considering it, I will no longer consider voting for John McCain. He has sullied my memories, sullied his campaign, and sullied himself with this disgusting gambit. He should be ashamed of himself. I pray only that the American public sees this shameful ploy for what it is and, if he continues it, rejects it soundly in November. Pathetic.
Monday, July 14, 2008
1999 Called...
...it wants its sequel back.
Isn't this a little odd. I mean, if the main movie-going public are teenagers and college kids (I have no idea if that's correct by the way) then that audience has almost no exposure to the X-Files, which ceased to be on the air 10 years ago. Who is going to watch this?
Isn't this a little odd. I mean, if the main movie-going public are teenagers and college kids (I have no idea if that's correct by the way) then that audience has almost no exposure to the X-Files, which ceased to be on the air 10 years ago. Who is going to watch this?
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
What...
...is this?
A) An Irish links-style golf course located about 30 minutes from my house;
B) Home to a course designed and built by the Irish Golf Association, because they could not find an adequately authentic Irish links-style golf course in the US;
C) Home to one of the most beautiful, engaging, and challenging courses I've ever played;
D) Home to my first (and probably last) HOLE IN ONE!
E) ALL OF THE ABOVE
Hint: Pick E. More details at my blog....
A) An Irish links-style golf course located about 30 minutes from my house;
B) Home to a course designed and built by the Irish Golf Association, because they could not find an adequately authentic Irish links-style golf course in the US;
C) Home to one of the most beautiful, engaging, and challenging courses I've ever played;
D) Home to my first (and probably last) HOLE IN ONE!
E) ALL OF THE ABOVE
Hint: Pick E. More details at my blog....
The New Atlantis was on "Penn & Teller's Bullshit"
You guys watch Penn & Teller's Bullshit, right? You saw this weekend's episode about NASA? Did you notice the guy from The New Atlantis being interviewed?
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
Why Democrats are the way they are
I think we've all wondered, from time to time, "Just what the fuck is wrong with Democrats?"
Thanks to Sen Harry Reid, now we know. Apparently, they didn't get the message that you're not supposed to drink the oil--you're supposed to burn the oil.
Thanks to Sen Harry Reid, now we know. Apparently, they didn't get the message that you're not supposed to drink the oil--you're supposed to burn the oil.
Fringe Benefits...
One of the fringe benefits of my job is that I get to sit here on certain afternoons while I a) participate in a conference call; and b) work on end-of-month financials. Mmmm, beer.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Someone Was Paid to Write These Stories
Only in America.
Boy George denied entry into the U.S. - this guy has some weird problems.
Shaq loses badge over Kobe rap - the bigger question is, who gave him a badge in the first place?
Boy George denied entry into the U.S. - this guy has some weird problems.
Shaq loses badge over Kobe rap - the bigger question is, who gave him a badge in the first place?
Monday, June 23, 2008
The Myth of Multitasking
Check it out, Keiper's rag made the front page of slashdot. Wonder if this will be good or bad for him?
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Least Surprising Revelation Ever
Don't know how many of you are watching the Real World Hollywood...anyone?...anyone?...but I finally watched last week's episode where Joey leaves the house for good to deal with his drug and alcohol problem. As he's leaving, he recounts how he first got hooked on illegal drugs at 19 when he started using anabolic steroids.
If you have watched this show at all, it is the least surprising revelation ever. I don't think it even counts as a revelation. This guy was so clearly roided up that it would have been a revelation if he got that way WITHOUT using steroids. And does MTV bear some responsibility for casting this guy on the show where he undoubtedly would come across copious amounts of drugs and alcohol?
Anyway, just thought I'd throw that in - parents, don't let your children grow up to appear on the Real World.
If you have watched this show at all, it is the least surprising revelation ever. I don't think it even counts as a revelation. This guy was so clearly roided up that it would have been a revelation if he got that way WITHOUT using steroids. And does MTV bear some responsibility for casting this guy on the show where he undoubtedly would come across copious amounts of drugs and alcohol?
Anyway, just thought I'd throw that in - parents, don't let your children grow up to appear on the Real World.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
I do believe...
I smell a championship.
101-70, Celtics over the Lakers, with 9:07 to play. Beautiful.
101-70, Celtics over the Lakers, with 9:07 to play. Beautiful.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Monday, June 09, 2008
Todd Young Maltcast - Part Two
Here's the second part of the podcast with Tood - discussing our racist landlord and dead landlords. And Todd sings Paul Williams' greatest hit: The Buffalohead song.
Thursday, June 05, 2008
Whoa, It's Todd
The podcast is back - in two parts. Part one is a talk with Todd Young, aka, Rod Hung, aka, Mom, about AU's Conduct Council - including Conduct Council's most famous case.
I have just one word to say about...
tonight's Last Comic Standing (because I can't stand to watch Game 1 of the Lakers-Celtics opener until at least the 3rd quarter): WHOOOOOOORRRRRRRE!!
God-damn that was funny ( and sick).
God-damn that was funny ( and sick).
Tuesday, June 03, 2008
Saturday, May 31, 2008
The Original 44th St. Hibachi Story...
I had multiple fun stories with the hibachi -- but the original story of the hibachi at 44th St revolved around my erroneous belief that the bottom of the hibachi was built to be "heat-proof".
I didn't realize that...the hibachi...had legs.
So, I set the hibachi down on its metal bottom on the wooden sill of the porch.
I lit it, put the chicken on, and walked away.
I came back some time later to find small flames licking up from beneath the hibachi. I immediately grabbed the hibachi, put it down on the floor of the porch (where it melted the indoor-outdoor carpet), and yelled to Chris, "Hey, can you get me a glass of water?"
He replied, jokingly, "Why, is the chicken on fire?"
I shot back, "No. the porch is."
A ha ha ha ha hilarity ensued........
I didn't realize that...the hibachi...had legs.
So, I set the hibachi down on its metal bottom on the wooden sill of the porch.
I lit it, put the chicken on, and walked away.
I came back some time later to find small flames licking up from beneath the hibachi. I immediately grabbed the hibachi, put it down on the floor of the porch (where it melted the indoor-outdoor carpet), and yelled to Chris, "Hey, can you get me a glass of water?"
He replied, jokingly, "Why, is the chicken on fire?"
I shot back, "No. the porch is."
A ha ha ha ha hilarity ensued........
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Gen Y Thinks We Care What They Think
Check out this story about Northwestern seniors upset that their commencement speaker is the Mayor of Chicago. I did like the response of NU's president to one of the students, though. Gen Y is stupid.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Things That Make You Go "PHOOM!"
Summer's practically here in San Diego, and I threw out my old $10 charcoal grill a few months ago. To replace it, I purchased one of those hibachi style propane grills at the local drug store. Also $10. You know the kind: Chapin nearly burned the house down with one.
Do you know how useful the gas regulators are on those things? I'll give you a hint: it rhymes with "Snot at all." Of course, it took a mighty "PHOOM!!" thundering through the front door to illustrate this fact clearly to Nicole and me. It had only been lit for 2 minutes before the damned thing became a raging inferno of flaming propane and aluminum.
I'm smarter than Chapin. I know this. Except I now have evidence to the contrary.
Do you know how useful the gas regulators are on those things? I'll give you a hint: it rhymes with "Snot at all." Of course, it took a mighty "PHOOM!!" thundering through the front door to illustrate this fact clearly to Nicole and me. It had only been lit for 2 minutes before the damned thing became a raging inferno of flaming propane and aluminum.
I'm smarter than Chapin. I know this. Except I now have evidence to the contrary.
Faith
A little bit of my faith in the world was restored today, when I learned that you can still get bubblegum cigarettes from the right sort of ice cream truck. And that my daughter bought a pack.
Friday, May 23, 2008
50 games in...
The Red Sox have completed 50 games -- or approximately 30.8% of the 2008 MLB regular season.
At this point, they stand at 31-19. They are #1 in the AL East, #1 in the AL, have the most wins in MLB, the best winning percentage in MLB, are ranked #2 in team batting, #7 in team pitching (ranked by Batting Average Against), and #11 in team fielding according to fielding percentage (.985). Now, subtracting Julio Lugo, that might go up significantly -- he has 11 of Boston's 28 errors. Subtract Lugo, and Boston has the most error-free defense in the league at a .991 fielding percentage.
All of this is to say, it's shaping up to be another fine year to be a member of Red Sox Nation.
2003 -- ALDS champs, ALCS losers
2004 -- ALDS champs, ALCS champs, World Series Champs
2005 -- ALDS losers
2007 ALDS champs, ALCS champs, World Series Champs
2008 -- Defending World Series Champs
At this point, they stand at 31-19. They are #1 in the AL East, #1 in the AL, have the most wins in MLB, the best winning percentage in MLB, are ranked #2 in team batting, #7 in team pitching (ranked by Batting Average Against), and #11 in team fielding according to fielding percentage (.985). Now, subtracting Julio Lugo, that might go up significantly -- he has 11 of Boston's 28 errors. Subtract Lugo, and Boston has the most error-free defense in the league at a .991 fielding percentage.
All of this is to say, it's shaping up to be another fine year to be a member of Red Sox Nation.
2003 -- ALDS champs, ALCS losers
2004 -- ALDS champs, ALCS champs, World Series Champs
2005 -- ALDS losers
2007 ALDS champs, ALCS champs, World Series Champs
2008 -- Defending World Series Champs
Thursday, May 22, 2008
A Question for the Two of You Who Watch "How I Met Your Mother"
Has a main character on a TV show ever been the least interesting character on that show? Really. This is a question that must be answered.
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Hadn't Thought About This in a While
I opened my Chicago Tribune today to find this story in there.
It's weird the things that slip from your mind. 20 years ago, my grade school, 2-3 blocks from the grade school where the shooting happened was on lockdown. The kid who was killed lived behind my parents' house at one time and next door to one of my classmates. The teacher of the classroom (not the substitute) was the wife of my grade school's former p.e. teacher. And the college student who was shot was from my parish and the brother of a guy a year behind me in school who was locked down with us at the time.
Anyway a downer of a story but quite the flashback to 7th grade.
It's weird the things that slip from your mind. 20 years ago, my grade school, 2-3 blocks from the grade school where the shooting happened was on lockdown. The kid who was killed lived behind my parents' house at one time and next door to one of my classmates. The teacher of the classroom (not the substitute) was the wife of my grade school's former p.e. teacher. And the college student who was shot was from my parish and the brother of a guy a year behind me in school who was locked down with us at the time.
Anyway a downer of a story but quite the flashback to 7th grade.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
New Malt Shop Logic Podcast
Snyder and I talk about NASCAR, the end of Metacrawler, Brandl's request to join the Malt Shop Logic family and whether Joe's quilt deserved it.
And it's under 40 minutes! Listen here.
And it's under 40 minutes! Listen here.
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
speaking of housekeeping
After 14 half-assed years (the last six of them bankrupt and out of business), Metacrawler finally remembered to turn off its free e-mail service.
The mattsnyder@metacrawler.com address goes away ca. June 6. It is replaced effective today with snyder.matthew.r@gmail.com though I suggest using my work address if you are interested in reaching me more quickly.
F technology.
The mattsnyder@metacrawler.com address goes away ca. June 6. It is replaced effective today with snyder.matthew.r@gmail.com though I suggest using my work address if you are interested in reaching me more quickly.
F technology.
Thursday, May 08, 2008
What was that I had said about Obama being "Reaganesque"?
Seems I'm not the only one who thinks so...see George Will's quote below from his most recent column. The entire column can be found here.
"McCain's problem might turn out to be the fact that Obama is the Democrats' Reagan. Obama's rhetorical cotton candy lacks Reagan's ideological nourishment, but he is Reaganesque in two important senses: People like listening to him, and his manner lulls his adversaries into underestimating his sheer toughness -- the tempered steel beneath the sleek suits."
"McCain's problem might turn out to be the fact that Obama is the Democrats' Reagan. Obama's rhetorical cotton candy lacks Reagan's ideological nourishment, but he is Reaganesque in two important senses: People like listening to him, and his manner lulls his adversaries into underestimating his sheer toughness -- the tempered steel beneath the sleek suits."
Wednesday, May 07, 2008
Housekeeping Note
You'll see to the right that I have added Brian's blog to our exclusive list of links here at maltshoplogic.
Also, I expect to have a new podcast up by Sun./Mon. That is all.
Also, I expect to have a new podcast up by Sun./Mon. That is all.
Monday, April 28, 2008
The Rant of All Rants
As I mentioned in my podcast with Joe, this is a tremendous year of Cubs anniversaries. The first one arrives tomorrow. 25 years ago on April 29, 1983, then-Cubs manager Lee Elia delivered one of the most famous tirades of all time. It is well-worth a listen. This is an understatement, but suffice it to say, this is NSFW.
Friday, April 25, 2008
Things that make Matt happy
1. Winning AHL Playoff Hockey (3 games into the series...all three have gone to OT... and the home team's up 2-1 after a 16-game winning streak to earn home ice for the playoffs).
2. Guttermouth's "Hot Dog to the Head."
3. Fishing season starts in a week.
4. Happy hour starts in four hours.
2. Guttermouth's "Hot Dog to the Head."
3. Fishing season starts in a week.
4. Happy hour starts in four hours.
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
You Play Who You Play
Chicago Cubs fans opened their Chicago Tribune on Monday morning to read a spate of stories about how the Cubs may be 12-6, but six of those wins came against the lowly Pittsburgh Pirates. (The Pirates may have been 7-11 at the time, but that does mean that they were 7-5 against non-Cub opponents.)
These stories took me back to this blog in May of 2005 when a certain Red Sox fan wrote this. I didn't think it held water then - my response was here - and it was the opposite of prescient given that season's outcome. I think the same thing today. You play who you play. It's not college basketball where you set up a challenging schedule to test your team. It's baseball.
Anyway, I hope we won't be seeing those stories for a while after the Cubs demolished the Mets in two games by a total score of 15-3 or something like that. But then again, sportswriters have to write something.
These stories took me back to this blog in May of 2005 when a certain Red Sox fan wrote this. I didn't think it held water then - my response was here - and it was the opposite of prescient given that season's outcome. I think the same thing today. You play who you play. It's not college basketball where you set up a challenging schedule to test your team. It's baseball.
Anyway, I hope we won't be seeing those stories for a while after the Cubs demolished the Mets in two games by a total score of 15-3 or something like that. But then again, sportswriters have to write something.
Monday, April 21, 2008
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
More bluntly
I don't trust that any of my governments are competent enough to organize taking a crap, much less the administration of death.
In the wake of today's decision...
...by the Supreme Court, I ask ye who read this blog, "Do you support the death penalty?"
I support a death penalty as the ultimate punitive measure taken by a civilized society in response to heinous criminal behavior that alienates man from his fellow men. If liberty is the most sacred possession of man, and life is the most basic form of liberty, and deprivation of liberty is an appropriate sanction for criminal behavior, then execution represents the ultimate deprivation of liberty by a society. And, I support the right of society to express and demonstrate its disapproval of heinous criminal behavior by implementing this ultimate sanction.
However, from a practical perspective, I would hold any state to the following requirements:
1. Death must be restricted to sanctioning what society considers the most awful and heinous crimes -- say, multiple murders, multiple rapes, etc.
2. The implementation of the death penalty must be predicated on a process of investigation, trial, and appeals, that includes the following:
A. A comprehensive investigation process that thoroughly and competently investigates crimes and yields...
B. Evidence that leaves no reasonable doubt of guilt
C. A competent jury following the judge's instructions, focused on the evidence, and untainted by bias(es) that might result in improper verdicts
D. A prosecution that operates above reproach and rigorously follows criminal law procedures and rules of evidence
E. An effective defense
F. A judge interested solely in the administration of justice
G. An appeals process that thoroughly and effectively investigates and adjudicates all possible faults in the investigatory and trials phase of the process
In our country, we've had significant problems meeting the criteria above. In fact, the American Bar Association is so deeply concerned about the administration of the death penalty that in 2001, it launched the "Death Penalty Moratorium Implementation Project." The ABA has stated that, "Over the course of the past thirty years, the American Bar Association (ABA) has become increasingly concerned that capital jurisdictions too often provide neither fairness nor accuracy in the administration of the death penalty."
Beginning in 2003, it undertook to investigate death penalty implementation, starting with 8 sample states -- Ohio, Alabama, Arizona, Indiana, Pennsylvania, Georgia, Tennessee, and Florida. The goal is to assess the extent to which state capital crime adjudication processes "achieve fairness and provide due process".
After studying state performance using local legal experts examining compliance with 93 ABA protocols in 12 different categories, the ABA found that "the process" of implementing the death penalty in those states is "deeply flawed". 5 of the 8 local legal teams representing the ABA were so disturbed by their findings that they recommended immediate moratoria on the use of the death penalty. Those teams were from Alabama, Georgia, Indiana, Ohio and Tennessee. The press release describing the study's findings can be found here.
The ABA's conclusions comport with other studies and build a powerful case for the conclusion that in our country, we do a poor job of administering the death penalty. This means that we try, convict, and possibly execute innocent people -- and this is unacceptable.
So, though I support the death penalty philosophically, I do not support it as administered in this country.
I support a death penalty as the ultimate punitive measure taken by a civilized society in response to heinous criminal behavior that alienates man from his fellow men. If liberty is the most sacred possession of man, and life is the most basic form of liberty, and deprivation of liberty is an appropriate sanction for criminal behavior, then execution represents the ultimate deprivation of liberty by a society. And, I support the right of society to express and demonstrate its disapproval of heinous criminal behavior by implementing this ultimate sanction.
However, from a practical perspective, I would hold any state to the following requirements:
1. Death must be restricted to sanctioning what society considers the most awful and heinous crimes -- say, multiple murders, multiple rapes, etc.
2. The implementation of the death penalty must be predicated on a process of investigation, trial, and appeals, that includes the following:
A. A comprehensive investigation process that thoroughly and competently investigates crimes and yields...
B. Evidence that leaves no reasonable doubt of guilt
C. A competent jury following the judge's instructions, focused on the evidence, and untainted by bias(es) that might result in improper verdicts
D. A prosecution that operates above reproach and rigorously follows criminal law procedures and rules of evidence
E. An effective defense
F. A judge interested solely in the administration of justice
G. An appeals process that thoroughly and effectively investigates and adjudicates all possible faults in the investigatory and trials phase of the process
In our country, we've had significant problems meeting the criteria above. In fact, the American Bar Association is so deeply concerned about the administration of the death penalty that in 2001, it launched the "Death Penalty Moratorium Implementation Project." The ABA has stated that, "Over the course of the past thirty years, the American Bar Association (ABA) has become increasingly concerned that capital jurisdictions too often provide neither fairness nor accuracy in the administration of the death penalty."
Beginning in 2003, it undertook to investigate death penalty implementation, starting with 8 sample states -- Ohio, Alabama, Arizona, Indiana, Pennsylvania, Georgia, Tennessee, and Florida. The goal is to assess the extent to which state capital crime adjudication processes "achieve fairness and provide due process".
After studying state performance using local legal experts examining compliance with 93 ABA protocols in 12 different categories, the ABA found that "the process" of implementing the death penalty in those states is "deeply flawed". 5 of the 8 local legal teams representing the ABA were so disturbed by their findings that they recommended immediate moratoria on the use of the death penalty. Those teams were from Alabama, Georgia, Indiana, Ohio and Tennessee. The press release describing the study's findings can be found here.
The ABA's conclusions comport with other studies and build a powerful case for the conclusion that in our country, we do a poor job of administering the death penalty. This means that we try, convict, and possibly execute innocent people -- and this is unacceptable.
So, though I support the death penalty philosophically, I do not support it as administered in this country.
So I have a new blog...
Ok, technically, it's not new.
Four years ago, not long after Matt, Amanda, Josh, etc., started using LiveJournal, I decided I'd do the same. And then I promptly ignored my own blog in favor of Malt Shop Logic for 4 years. Well, I've finally begun to use it. Click here to read my Nomadic Scribblings.....................
Four years ago, not long after Matt, Amanda, Josh, etc., started using LiveJournal, I decided I'd do the same. And then I promptly ignored my own blog in favor of Malt Shop Logic for 4 years. Well, I've finally begun to use it. Click here to read my Nomadic Scribblings.....................
Monday, April 14, 2008
Denied...but that's ok.
The recent interview process I referred to on this blog has concluded with a negative answer from the firm interested in hiring me. But, that's ok. Go here to read more detail....
Thursday, April 10, 2008
The very best thing
Yes, I fight dirty.
Cut-and-paste,
http://www.howmanyfiveyearoldscouldyoutakeinafight.com/
Cut-and-paste,
http://www.howmanyfiveyearoldscouldyoutakeinafight.com/
Monday, April 07, 2008
Well, My System Works (This Year, At Least)
Too bad I didn't follow it all the way to get the correct championship game (which is exactly why I have a system to prevent me from outthinking myself). Here's your top 5 Adjusted Scoring Margin rankings for this year's tournament and the finish:
1. Kansas 22.2 - Championship Game
2. Memphis 21.1 - Championship Game
3. UNC 19.5 - Final Four
4. Duke 18.5 - Second Round
5. UCLA 17.2 - Final Four
Here's your top 8 Efficiency Margin (major conference games only) rankings for this year's tournament and finish:
1. Memphis 28.78 - Championship Game
2. Kansas 24.23 - Championship Game
3. Wisconsin 18.34 - Sweet 16
4. UCLA 17.26 - Final Four
5. Tennessee 15.01 - Sweet 16
6. UNC 14.67 - Final Four
7. Louisville 14.65 - Elite 8
8. Xavier 14.41 - Elite 8
The system, having been redeemed, shall be posted next year.
1. Kansas 22.2 - Championship Game
2. Memphis 21.1 - Championship Game
3. UNC 19.5 - Final Four
4. Duke 18.5 - Second Round
5. UCLA 17.2 - Final Four
Here's your top 8 Efficiency Margin (major conference games only) rankings for this year's tournament and finish:
1. Memphis 28.78 - Championship Game
2. Kansas 24.23 - Championship Game
3. Wisconsin 18.34 - Sweet 16
4. UCLA 17.26 - Final Four
5. Tennessee 15.01 - Sweet 16
6. UNC 14.67 - Final Four
7. Louisville 14.65 - Elite 8
8. Xavier 14.41 - Elite 8
The system, having been redeemed, shall be posted next year.
Thursday, April 03, 2008
Goddamn Cubs Thud
Season's first crack o' the bat... and one over the fence.
Here we go again.
On the bright side, the hometown AHL squad is at nine wins and running (a team record) and points in the last 17 (AHL record is 23) and has clinched the playoffs, and is on the way to home ice with four games to go.
And the caps -- yes, the lowly caps! Are one point out with four to go.
SU basketball? Maybe not so much.
Here we go again.
On the bright side, the hometown AHL squad is at nine wins and running (a team record) and points in the last 17 (AHL record is 23) and has clinched the playoffs, and is on the way to home ice with four games to go.
And the caps -- yes, the lowly caps! Are one point out with four to go.
SU basketball? Maybe not so much.
Saturday, March 29, 2008
Freeeeeedoommmmmmm!
Since October, I've been working on a project unlike any other I've ever worked on in my professional career. It focused on one of the most important basic services -- emergency response -- that any city/state/federal level government can perform. Yet, it was also the most dysfunctional, awful project I've EVER worked on.
Not until this particular project did I ever feel a degree of misery about going to work on a daily basis. But on this project, I HATED going to work. Quite literally, I was stuck between multiple warring parties who all used my presence, and the presence of our team, as a proxy for their fights. The cops hate the firefighters, the firefighters hate the cops, they both hate the executive branch leader, the executive branch leader hates each of them, they're all stuck together working on this initiative, and they all use us to fight battles against each other.
Every day, we were screamed at, stabbed in the back, lied to, lied about, accused of every type of improper behavior one can think of, threatened, and spied on.
Yesterday, I escaped. I'm off that project and on to another. I've never felt so happy to leave a client environment. I actually skipped out of the building I was so damn happy to leave and NEVER, EVER, EVER come back.
Then, I enjoyed a few drinks here. I highly recommend it if you're ever in town.
Not until this particular project did I ever feel a degree of misery about going to work on a daily basis. But on this project, I HATED going to work. Quite literally, I was stuck between multiple warring parties who all used my presence, and the presence of our team, as a proxy for their fights. The cops hate the firefighters, the firefighters hate the cops, they both hate the executive branch leader, the executive branch leader hates each of them, they're all stuck together working on this initiative, and they all use us to fight battles against each other.
Every day, we were screamed at, stabbed in the back, lied to, lied about, accused of every type of improper behavior one can think of, threatened, and spied on.
Yesterday, I escaped. I'm off that project and on to another. I've never felt so happy to leave a client environment. I actually skipped out of the building I was so damn happy to leave and NEVER, EVER, EVER come back.
Then, I enjoyed a few drinks here. I highly recommend it if you're ever in town.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
To be sung...
to the tune of Skip to My Lou...(yes, I've been spending too much time around my small child)...
I just don't give a shit
I just don't give a shit
I just don't give a shit
About my current project
I wish my clients would die
I wish my clients would die
I wish my clients would die
In a blazing inferno
Then I'd laugh till I cried
Then I'd laugh till I cried
Then I'd laugh till I cried
Because they're all morons
Now I feel better.
I just don't give a shit
I just don't give a shit
I just don't give a shit
About my current project
I wish my clients would die
I wish my clients would die
I wish my clients would die
In a blazing inferno
Then I'd laugh till I cried
Then I'd laugh till I cried
Then I'd laugh till I cried
Because they're all morons
Now I feel better.
Friday, March 21, 2008
16 for 16
Before today's results ruin it, just thought I'd point out that my stupid system that I usually post but did not this year was 16 for 16 yesterday in the NCAA tournament. That's great.
What's disconcerting is that the system is designed to get Elite 8 and Final 4 teams, not get every first round game right. So, overall, this could be trouble.
What's disconcerting is that the system is designed to get Elite 8 and Final 4 teams, not get every first round game right. So, overall, this could be trouble.
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Drink Club
To paraphrase Tyler Durden:
The first rule of Drink Club is: You do not photograph Drink Club.
The second rule of Drink Club is: You do not photograph Drink Club.
Judging by the internet, some of you have forgotten these rules.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
New Podcast
There's a new Malt Shop Logic Podcast here:
http://www.archive.org/details/MaltShopLogicPodcast-March182008
It's a double preview edition of the podcast as Rob Spuhler leverages his MLS knowledge as a beat writer covering Chivas USA to try to explain what this thing called soccer is and we look ahead to the NCAA tournament. There is no truth to the rumor that I suggest that AU maybe can sort of win on Friday. Not all that much truth at least.
BTW, sorry for the length. I have lost my disciplined timekeeping skills, plus the MLS is actually pretty interesting.
http://www.archive.org/details/MaltShopLogicPodcast-March182008
It's a double preview edition of the podcast as Rob Spuhler leverages his MLS knowledge as a beat writer covering Chivas USA to try to explain what this thing called soccer is and we look ahead to the NCAA tournament. There is no truth to the rumor that I suggest that AU maybe can sort of win on Friday. Not all that much truth at least.
BTW, sorry for the length. I have lost my disciplined timekeeping skills, plus the MLS is actually pretty interesting.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
The argument will resume...
Gentlemen,
We will resume the discussion tomorrow afternoon after I complete my 3rd interview at a potential new employer...currently scheduled for 12:30 tomorrow.
We will resume the discussion tomorrow afternoon after I complete my 3rd interview at a potential new employer...currently scheduled for 12:30 tomorrow.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Crisis over...
Audrey, Cherie, and I are home. Tired, no, exhausted, but home. We were discharged after Audrey continued to show significant positive progress. Her infection is receding, the swelling has all but disappeared, and we're happy that she's no longer hooked up to tubes in the hospital. She'll have another 10 days' worth of prescription antibiotics to take, and several follow-up appts. to make, but other than that, she should be ok.
No word on how exactly she contracted cellulitis, but it apparently can be caused by an existing, persistent sinus infection, which Audrey did have for the last week or two. It's not directly contagious, because the infection occurs in the deeper layers of the skin and the bacteria don't normally migrate to the surface of the skin.
But, man, this experience both sucked and blew.
No word on how exactly she contracted cellulitis, but it apparently can be caused by an existing, persistent sinus infection, which Audrey did have for the last week or two. It's not directly contagious, because the infection occurs in the deeper layers of the skin and the bacteria don't normally migrate to the surface of the skin.
But, man, this experience both sucked and blew.
We interrupt this history-making basketball game to bring you life-threatening illness...
Friday afternoon, while plotting how to catch part of the Patriot League Championship on TV, I received a call from Cherie. She was at daycare with Audrey, who had awakened from a mid-day nap with her right eye swollen shut. It didn't look like pink-eye -- no oozing, no crustiness. Instead, it looked like someone had punched her in the eye, and she was developing the kind of swelling above and below her eye that a day or two later would yield a black eye.
Cherie and I debated whether to take her to a doctor. We had just about decided to just take her home, put her to bed, and see how she looked in the morning. But something kept nagging at Cherie and me, and we talked ourselves back into a Friday night trip to the emergency room.
After several hours of mostly waiting through various stages of triage, we saw a Physician's Assistant. She agreed with us that Audrey's eye looked "injured, not infected". But she second-guessed herself and later brought in a doctor for a second opinion, and it may have saved Audrey's eyesight or even her life.
It turns out that Audrey had peri-orbital cellulitis. For those of you who aren't doctors, that's a bacterial infection of the skin or connective tissues of the body, and in this case, tissues in and around the "bony cavity" surrounding the eye. While it doesn't manifest itself in an obvious way, it's often aggressive, and without immediate treatment can rapidly transition into a life-threatening condition. Untreated for only a short period of time, it can lead to very serious consequences for its victims -- most often blindness, and/or meningitis and/or a brain abcess.
By the time we got Audrey seen and correctly diagnosed, the disease was making that transition from serious annoyance to serious condition. Audrey was admitted to the hospital and started a course of very powerful antibiotics delivered intravenously.
Throughout the night, and again today, she's been pumped full of drugs. The swelling, which at first worsened, has receded significantly, and Audrey appears to be on the mend. Provided all is well, she will be discharged tomorrow and we will all go home.
For now, I am thankful for the medical staff at Danbury Hospital, who have once again earned my admiration for their competence and compassion. They were phenomenal in 2006 when Audrey was born, they were tremendous when Audrey tumbled down the stairs last summer, and they have been phenomenal this weekend.
And, I am thankful for Cherie, who proved again this weekend that when a serious situation arises, she rises to the occasion. She has been patient, calm, and strong at every turn -- and has been great with Audrey. Just a great, great mom during a difficult time. As a dad and partner, it makes me love her all the more when she responds this way to a crisis. Damn, she's a good woman.
Cherie and I debated whether to take her to a doctor. We had just about decided to just take her home, put her to bed, and see how she looked in the morning. But something kept nagging at Cherie and me, and we talked ourselves back into a Friday night trip to the emergency room.
After several hours of mostly waiting through various stages of triage, we saw a Physician's Assistant. She agreed with us that Audrey's eye looked "injured, not infected". But she second-guessed herself and later brought in a doctor for a second opinion, and it may have saved Audrey's eyesight or even her life.
It turns out that Audrey had peri-orbital cellulitis. For those of you who aren't doctors, that's a bacterial infection of the skin or connective tissues of the body, and in this case, tissues in and around the "bony cavity" surrounding the eye. While it doesn't manifest itself in an obvious way, it's often aggressive, and without immediate treatment can rapidly transition into a life-threatening condition. Untreated for only a short period of time, it can lead to very serious consequences for its victims -- most often blindness, and/or meningitis and/or a brain abcess.
By the time we got Audrey seen and correctly diagnosed, the disease was making that transition from serious annoyance to serious condition. Audrey was admitted to the hospital and started a course of very powerful antibiotics delivered intravenously.
Throughout the night, and again today, she's been pumped full of drugs. The swelling, which at first worsened, has receded significantly, and Audrey appears to be on the mend. Provided all is well, she will be discharged tomorrow and we will all go home.
For now, I am thankful for the medical staff at Danbury Hospital, who have once again earned my admiration for their competence and compassion. They were phenomenal in 2006 when Audrey was born, they were tremendous when Audrey tumbled down the stairs last summer, and they have been phenomenal this weekend.
And, I am thankful for Cherie, who proved again this weekend that when a serious situation arises, she rises to the occasion. She has been patient, calm, and strong at every turn -- and has been great with Audrey. Just a great, great mom during a difficult time. As a dad and partner, it makes me love her all the more when she responds this way to a crisis. Damn, she's a good woman.
Friday, March 14, 2008
A Report from Illini Nation...
...that does not involve Obamania. Since the other blog is the province of AU-phoria, let me point out the University of Minnesota's ridonkulous last second win over Indiana. Who cares? This Illinois fan does. I have been quite a critic of the Big Ten Network-Comcast feud this year until basketball season rolled around and the bevy of Illini games on BTN thankfully prevented me from watching some awful basketball.
All of sudden, though, Illinois is winning close games they used to be losing and get to play Minny instead of Indiana in the Big Ten tournament semis tomorrow.
Nine years ago, the somewhat infamous Chris Close-victory jig was inaugurated in 44th St, NW when the #11 seed Illinois Fighting Illini defeated the #2 seed Ohio State Buckeyes in the Big Ten tourney semis. The task tomorrow is somewhat less daunting. Could one of the worst Illinois teams ever make it to the NCAA tournament by running the table in the Big 11 tournament? Looks much more likely than it did just a few hours ago.
That is all.
All of sudden, though, Illinois is winning close games they used to be losing and get to play Minny instead of Indiana in the Big Ten tournament semis tomorrow.
Nine years ago, the somewhat infamous Chris Close-victory jig was inaugurated in 44th St, NW when the #11 seed Illinois Fighting Illini defeated the #2 seed Ohio State Buckeyes in the Big Ten tourney semis. The task tomorrow is somewhat less daunting. Could one of the worst Illinois teams ever make it to the NCAA tournament by running the table in the Big 11 tournament? Looks much more likely than it did just a few hours ago.
That is all.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
The [half?] bright side
I've been trying to come up with something positive if Obama were to get into the White House. So far, the only thing I can come up with is that if we've elected a black guy (ok, he's only half, but still) as president, then we should be ready ahead of the 25 year schedule set out by our genius Supreme Court to toss out affirmative action.
Or, if you believe Gerard Ferraro, maybe that's why he got the job in the first place.
Or, if you believe Gerard Ferraro, maybe that's why he got the job in the first place.
Monday, March 10, 2008
New Music Bleg
If you happened to catch Saturday Night Live this week (or tivo-ed it as the case may be), you saw a hilarious opening sketch (well, at least the first four minutes) and if you didn't skip through the musical act were introduced to Vampire Weekend.
I am now completely enthralled with this band's music. But that's not the bleg - this is: where do all of you find new bands to listen to - and by that I mean before they end up on SNL? I'm just curious as my local radio stations, at least the ones I listen to, do not seem to be helping me out.
Thanks for your guidance.
I am now completely enthralled with this band's music. But that's not the bleg - this is: where do all of you find new bands to listen to - and by that I mean before they end up on SNL? I'm just curious as my local radio stations, at least the ones I listen to, do not seem to be helping me out.
Thanks for your guidance.
Saturday, March 08, 2008
World, prepare thyself...
Chapin baby #2 arrives approximately August 8, 2008. We'll find out next Thursday (Mar. 20th) whether we're unleashing a boy or girl upon the unsuspecting denizens of this planet........
Thursday, March 06, 2008
Politics Is Interesting Again
I have to say, that Democratic primary for president has made politics interesting again. Who knew in this day and age that we could end up with a political convention that actually matters.
What this contest has also reintroduced us to is something that I thought was lost forever: the Clinton in-fighting story. Check out this story from today's Post for a hilarious account of how everyone on her campaign hates each other.
It would be quite a loss for newspaper reporters if the Clintons leave us too soon.
What this contest has also reintroduced us to is something that I thought was lost forever: the Clinton in-fighting story. Check out this story from today's Post for a hilarious account of how everyone on her campaign hates each other.
It would be quite a loss for newspaper reporters if the Clintons leave us too soon.
Friday, February 29, 2008
A Very Special Podcast
The American, card carrying union member-equivalent of Jose Weinbergo joins us for the podcast to talk MLB, crapping at the Malt Shop, and how he "got a scholarship."
http://www.archive.org/details/MaltShopLogicPodcast-February292008
http://www.archive.org/details/MaltShopLogicPodcast-February292008
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Calling all job-seekers....
All:
My current employer is seeking employees to fill vacancies. Despite the problems the company writ large has had, my segment, Public Services, is the top performing business unit in the entire company. We are profitable and growing, have well over $1 billion in work, and we need new people. If you have friends, particularly in the DC area, who are looking for management/technology consulting work in any of the following "hot" areas, let me know:
1. TS (Top Secret), TS/SCI and TS/SCI with Poly active security clearances (all skills)
2. Federal Financial Management (Civilian, DoD, A-123, accounting, audit, finance, budget, cost analysis, acquisition)
3. Federal Contracts and Compliance
4. Advisors – must be willing to work in challenging international environments (think Aghanistan/Iraq) (pension, finance, post-conflict resolution, public services, infrastructure, IT, legal, policy, management consulting)
5. Application Development (Java, J2EE, .Net, SQL, SharePoint, MOSS, Documentum)
Network/Systems Administration & ITIL
6. Management Consulting - Previous consulting experience and advanced degrees required (Human Capital, Business Transformation, Six Sigma Black Belt/MBB, Performance Management, Training/Instructional Design)
7. Information Assurance/Security
8. Enterprise Architecture, Systems Architecture & Service-Oriented Architecture
9. Database Development/Administration (Informatica, Oracle, SQL Server)
10. Business Intelligence (Cognos, Business Objects)
11. Project Management (PMI certified)
And yes, I'm putting this out there because I get anywhere from $1K-$3K as a referral depending on the level of "referred" employee.
My current employer is seeking employees to fill vacancies. Despite the problems the company writ large has had, my segment, Public Services, is the top performing business unit in the entire company. We are profitable and growing, have well over $1 billion in work, and we need new people. If you have friends, particularly in the DC area, who are looking for management/technology consulting work in any of the following "hot" areas, let me know:
1. TS (Top Secret), TS/SCI and TS/SCI with Poly active security clearances (all skills)
2. Federal Financial Management (Civilian, DoD, A-123, accounting, audit, finance, budget, cost analysis, acquisition)
3. Federal Contracts and Compliance
4. Advisors – must be willing to work in challenging international environments (think Aghanistan/Iraq) (pension, finance, post-conflict resolution, public services, infrastructure, IT, legal, policy, management consulting)
5. Application Development (Java, J2EE, .Net, SQL, SharePoint, MOSS, Documentum)
Network/Systems Administration & ITIL
6. Management Consulting - Previous consulting experience and advanced degrees required (Human Capital, Business Transformation, Six Sigma Black Belt/MBB, Performance Management, Training/Instructional Design)
7. Information Assurance/Security
8. Enterprise Architecture, Systems Architecture & Service-Oriented Architecture
9. Database Development/Administration (Informatica, Oracle, SQL Server)
10. Business Intelligence (Cognos, Business Objects)
11. Project Management (PMI certified)
And yes, I'm putting this out there because I get anywhere from $1K-$3K as a referral depending on the level of "referred" employee.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
The coarsening of me....
After one of my recent rants on his blog, Josh asked, "What happened to the fun-loving Chapin....?"
Josh, my answer is, "New York happened."
New York City is more crowded than you can appreciate unless you've spent a significant amount of time living or working here, and have lived or worked in other large cities not afflicted with New York's mob.
The subways are always jammed with people. The sidewalks are always jammed with people. The elevators are always jammed with people. Restaurants, bathrooms, stairwells, parks -- every public space is always crowded.
In New York, you cannot walk anywhere without constantly being bumped, jostled, and squeezed. In the subways, and on the platforms, you can't stand anywhere without being constantly compressed. I don't suffer from claustrophobia, but there have been more than a few days when I've been panicky to get aboveground after a particularly bad subway experience and deeply grateful for at least a moment of space and a breath of fresh air as I rise out of the Fulton Street 4-5 station.
When I first arrived in Manhattan, if I bumped into someone -- or got bumped -- my first reaction was to feel embarrassed or impolite and apologize.
Now, I scan the crowds in front of me, looking for pathways through the mob, and if someone bumps me or gets in my way, my first mental reaction is often, "Eh -- f*** you!" It gets to the point where you might actually enjoy bumping other people who are clearly new to NYC's rhythms (or oblivious to them), and do not realize they should not get in the way of a NYC veteran moving from Point A to Point B.
As I said on Josh's blog, I call it "Full Contact Walking". And I'm not alone -- many of my colleagues and friends have similar terms for what has nearly become a pastime.
Finally, the crowding here means that it takes forever to get anywhere. I routinely commute 90-120 minutes each way per day. Now, I live 30 miles away from NYC. But, my friends who live on the Upper East Side, or the Upper West Side, or in Queens, routinely commute 60-90 minutes one-way via the subway to get to lower Manhattan. And they live barely a few miles away from the southernmost tip of Manhattan.
The constant fighting through crowds toughens you, roughens you, makes you less patient, more aggressive -- it's why New Yorkers have the reputation they do -- New York City molds its residents. It has certainly coarsened me. I've already had a few "Hey, f*** you, pal!" moments --even with (well-deserving) women.
So, Josh, there's your answer.
Josh, my answer is, "New York happened."
New York City is more crowded than you can appreciate unless you've spent a significant amount of time living or working here, and have lived or worked in other large cities not afflicted with New York's mob.
The subways are always jammed with people. The sidewalks are always jammed with people. The elevators are always jammed with people. Restaurants, bathrooms, stairwells, parks -- every public space is always crowded.
In New York, you cannot walk anywhere without constantly being bumped, jostled, and squeezed. In the subways, and on the platforms, you can't stand anywhere without being constantly compressed. I don't suffer from claustrophobia, but there have been more than a few days when I've been panicky to get aboveground after a particularly bad subway experience and deeply grateful for at least a moment of space and a breath of fresh air as I rise out of the Fulton Street 4-5 station.
When I first arrived in Manhattan, if I bumped into someone -- or got bumped -- my first reaction was to feel embarrassed or impolite and apologize.
Now, I scan the crowds in front of me, looking for pathways through the mob, and if someone bumps me or gets in my way, my first mental reaction is often, "Eh -- f*** you!" It gets to the point where you might actually enjoy bumping other people who are clearly new to NYC's rhythms (or oblivious to them), and do not realize they should not get in the way of a NYC veteran moving from Point A to Point B.
As I said on Josh's blog, I call it "Full Contact Walking". And I'm not alone -- many of my colleagues and friends have similar terms for what has nearly become a pastime.
Finally, the crowding here means that it takes forever to get anywhere. I routinely commute 90-120 minutes each way per day. Now, I live 30 miles away from NYC. But, my friends who live on the Upper East Side, or the Upper West Side, or in Queens, routinely commute 60-90 minutes one-way via the subway to get to lower Manhattan. And they live barely a few miles away from the southernmost tip of Manhattan.
The constant fighting through crowds toughens you, roughens you, makes you less patient, more aggressive -- it's why New Yorkers have the reputation they do -- New York City molds its residents. It has certainly coarsened me. I've already had a few "Hey, f*** you, pal!" moments --even with (well-deserving) women.
So, Josh, there's your answer.
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Primary strategies
I decided after all to treat the primary like I normally treat the Superbowl. There was no one worth rooting for, but I could find someone to root against. I chose to root against B. Hussein Obama. I even got on the news. Here's something I'll bet that no one who knows me would have ever predicted (from the local CBS morning news):
Saturday, February 09, 2008
Bye-Ku
Seventeen billion
Not enough profit. Got out
Before my job cut.
With the perspective of all of 24 hours, let me say this: I could not be happier to be out of BP. It wasn’t a complete waste of 14 months, but that company is in chaos right now. I think it’s actually headed in the right direction (when you’re going to be laying off people who only have one hour of work a day, you’re at least finally correcting some major mistakes), but I’ll take a safe seat in another large company any day.
See ya, BP!
Not enough profit. Got out
Before my job cut.
With the perspective of all of 24 hours, let me say this: I could not be happier to be out of BP. It wasn’t a complete waste of 14 months, but that company is in chaos right now. I think it’s actually headed in the right direction (when you’re going to be laying off people who only have one hour of work a day, you’re at least finally correcting some major mistakes), but I’ll take a safe seat in another large company any day.
See ya, BP!
Friday, February 08, 2008
Primary Candidate Dilemma Solved!
For those of you pained by the lack of quality candidates, I figure it's time to declare my write-in candidacy and officially throw my hat in the ring.
My platform is simple: End Poverty! (Kill the Poor)
World Peace! (Nuke Mecca...and France)
Cut marginal tax rates and eliminate capital gains taxes. End Medicare and Social Security. Annex Canada, and sell Quebec to the French. I guess we'd have to do that BEFORE we nuke them. Suckers.
Vote Freedom! Vote Renkey!
My platform is simple: End Poverty! (Kill the Poor)
World Peace! (Nuke Mecca...and France)
Cut marginal tax rates and eliminate capital gains taxes. End Medicare and Social Security. Annex Canada, and sell Quebec to the French. I guess we'd have to do that BEFORE we nuke them. Suckers.
Vote Freedom! Vote Renkey!
Wednesday, February 06, 2008
Primary musings
I'm going to pull a Chappy and write a long post.
If nothing else, it's been an interesting primary season. Going in to it, I was planning on voting for Rudy, before he dropped out. Of course, now I'm told that he's a moderate, apparently because of his social views. What interests me about this is that even though it seems to be how most of the talking heads evaluate a candidate's conservativeness, it really doesn't seem to be a good yard stick for Rudy, at least pragmatically.
Unless you're talking gun control, he's basically in line with the most socially conservative agenda. There's really not much more than appointing judges that a president can do about abortion. And there's probably not too much that can be done about gun control. Even so, I believe that Bush has filed a brief in support of DC's handgun ban, and no one's ever accused Bush of being for gun control.
So my summary of Rudy would be: wants to cut taxes, big time hawk, in favor of legal abortion and some limits on gun rights (though his stated position on the main lever he has--judges--for these issues would likely tilt the other way on both). Plus, I figured that having grown up politically in a hostile NYC media environment would have made him able to fight back against Hillary or whatever happened with that other party. But his campaign strategy obviously didn't pay off.
The buzz on Huckabee has me baffled, too. He's always (unless you're listening to Rush or Hannity) referred to as a conservative, and lots of self identified conservatives seem to be voting for him. The general consensus seems to be that he's siphoning conservative votes from Romney. He's definitely in line with the social conservative wing, but otherwise, he's always struck me as a guy in the wrong party. He supports the Fair Tax, which is apparently big in some libertarian-esque circles. It's an interesting idea, but one that I don't think would work the way they say it would. And the way that they calculate the rate is really misleading, so that's another strike against it. Not to mention the fact that unless you repealed the income tax, there's no way that any tax will replace the income tax instead of supplement it.
Then, of course, there's McCain. There's no way I would ever vote for him in a primary, and it's no sure thing that I would in a general election. He's basically a hawk. He's also a main opponent of free [political] speech. He likes to take on pork barrel spending (though in reality, it's not the bridges to nowhere that are the problem, it's the entitlements, stupit). He's voted against lowering taxes several times, so I'm not sure I believe him now that he wants my vote that he'll be for lowering them when in the White House. His gang of 14 stunt was questionable. In short, I suspect that if elected, he'd be a collaborator with the Democrats just like he is right now in the Senate. And because he's Republican, he'd probably be able to get enough Rs to go along with whatever Nancy Reid and Harry Pelosi can come up with. At least if it were a Dem in the Oval Office, the Republicans wouldn't be fooled by the President's party into supporting so many stupid things as I suspect will come from McCain.
I guess that means I'll pull the lever for Romney, but I have very little confidence in this guy. I suppose some leeway is in order for evaluating his Taxachussetts administration, but seriously, his health care reform really stinks like HillaryCare-lite. He's another one who's only recently found the "Reagan-conservative" religion.
If nothing else, it's been an interesting primary season. Going in to it, I was planning on voting for Rudy, before he dropped out. Of course, now I'm told that he's a moderate, apparently because of his social views. What interests me about this is that even though it seems to be how most of the talking heads evaluate a candidate's conservativeness, it really doesn't seem to be a good yard stick for Rudy, at least pragmatically.
Unless you're talking gun control, he's basically in line with the most socially conservative agenda. There's really not much more than appointing judges that a president can do about abortion. And there's probably not too much that can be done about gun control. Even so, I believe that Bush has filed a brief in support of DC's handgun ban, and no one's ever accused Bush of being for gun control.
So my summary of Rudy would be: wants to cut taxes, big time hawk, in favor of legal abortion and some limits on gun rights (though his stated position on the main lever he has--judges--for these issues would likely tilt the other way on both). Plus, I figured that having grown up politically in a hostile NYC media environment would have made him able to fight back against Hillary or whatever happened with that other party. But his campaign strategy obviously didn't pay off.
The buzz on Huckabee has me baffled, too. He's always (unless you're listening to Rush or Hannity) referred to as a conservative, and lots of self identified conservatives seem to be voting for him. The general consensus seems to be that he's siphoning conservative votes from Romney. He's definitely in line with the social conservative wing, but otherwise, he's always struck me as a guy in the wrong party. He supports the Fair Tax, which is apparently big in some libertarian-esque circles. It's an interesting idea, but one that I don't think would work the way they say it would. And the way that they calculate the rate is really misleading, so that's another strike against it. Not to mention the fact that unless you repealed the income tax, there's no way that any tax will replace the income tax instead of supplement it.
Then, of course, there's McCain. There's no way I would ever vote for him in a primary, and it's no sure thing that I would in a general election. He's basically a hawk. He's also a main opponent of free [political] speech. He likes to take on pork barrel spending (though in reality, it's not the bridges to nowhere that are the problem, it's the entitlements, stupit). He's voted against lowering taxes several times, so I'm not sure I believe him now that he wants my vote that he'll be for lowering them when in the White House. His gang of 14 stunt was questionable. In short, I suspect that if elected, he'd be a collaborator with the Democrats just like he is right now in the Senate. And because he's Republican, he'd probably be able to get enough Rs to go along with whatever Nancy Reid and Harry Pelosi can come up with. At least if it were a Dem in the Oval Office, the Republicans wouldn't be fooled by the President's party into supporting so many stupid things as I suspect will come from McCain.
I guess that means I'll pull the lever for Romney, but I have very little confidence in this guy. I suppose some leeway is in order for evaluating his Taxachussetts administration, but seriously, his health care reform really stinks like HillaryCare-lite. He's another one who's only recently found the "Reagan-conservative" religion.
Sunday, January 27, 2008
In praise of recession...
Among the folks who contribute to this blog, and I'm thinking particularly of Paul, Todd, Chris, and Matt Lewis, I would venture to say that I am one of the contributors least schooled in economic theory. So I'll preface the rest of this post with this admission -- it's steeped in at least some ignorance. Having said that...
I don't believe in government economic stimulus for the purpose of rescuing a faltering US economy. I don't believe it's appropriate, and I don't believe it will be effective.
As I understand it, the present global economic decline has been caused by a series of bad decisions made by institutions and individuals, particularly in the US, over the last several years. Those decisions include:
1. Credit lending firms began offering sizable credit lines to persons with shaky credit;
2. Mortgage firms lowered their lending standards;
3. Mortgage firms devised new mortgage devices, particularly the Adjustable Rate Mortgage, or "ARM", which in many cases offered minimal to non-existent downpayments coupled with a short-term, low "teaser" interest rate, for anywhere for 2-5 years, before exposing lendees to potentially large expansions in interest rates;
4. Investing institutions all over the world acquired and otherwise invested in these credit and mortgage firms.
5. Individuals previously incapable of acquiring mortgages or large credit lines acquired both.
After these decisions were implemented, many individuals and institutions began defaulting on their credit payment obligations; home and business owners proved incapable of meeting the terms of their ARM lending agreements, and subsequently suffered the inception of foreclosure procedures against their properties; credit firms and mortgage firms began to suffer as defaults piled up; institutions that had invested in such credit and mortgage firms began suffering as their investments tanked; and confidence in the global economy at stock exchanges around the world declined.
Consequently, three things have happened: individuals have lost their homes and found themselves in debt; the institutions (JP Morgan, Citibank, etc.) that suffered as a result of bad investments have taken steps to weather this current "crisis" -- they have made corrections in their investment strategies and secured funding from other investment houses and governments to offset their losses; and, governments, especially our government, have wrung their hands about creating a "stimulus" package to protect the US economy against further decline and to lessen the impact of the decline on individual US citizens, particularly the "middle class" and "working class".
I am highly skeptical of any "economic stimulus" package put together by our government for two reasons.
First, I don't think it's appropriate for the government to intervene in this situation in a manner that would obscure or soften the consequences of bad decisionmaking by actors in this economy. People shouldn't spend to the limit on their Capital One credit cards, and they shouldn't take on shady mortgages that promise low teaser interest rates and low/no downpayments on the front end with potentially huge interest rates on the back end. Don't know what the LIBOR is, and didn't bother to look it up before signing the mortgage papers? Well, now you have to learn the hard way to read before signing.
Institutions should have to take the steps they are already taking to correct investment strategy errors. For some, if that means going out of business, so be it -- that's the way the economy works, no?
Second, the US government should not pretend to address softness in the economy by doling out small amounts of money on the false premise that it's going to have a significant impact on the economy. It won't. Will it make me feel good for a day to hold that check? Yes. Might it prop up the sales of Best Buy or Circuit City for a week? Yes. Will it fix the problems that afflict our economy? Not a chance.
Will someone please explain to me why I'm wrong?
I don't believe in government economic stimulus for the purpose of rescuing a faltering US economy. I don't believe it's appropriate, and I don't believe it will be effective.
As I understand it, the present global economic decline has been caused by a series of bad decisions made by institutions and individuals, particularly in the US, over the last several years. Those decisions include:
1. Credit lending firms began offering sizable credit lines to persons with shaky credit;
2. Mortgage firms lowered their lending standards;
3. Mortgage firms devised new mortgage devices, particularly the Adjustable Rate Mortgage, or "ARM", which in many cases offered minimal to non-existent downpayments coupled with a short-term, low "teaser" interest rate, for anywhere for 2-5 years, before exposing lendees to potentially large expansions in interest rates;
4. Investing institutions all over the world acquired and otherwise invested in these credit and mortgage firms.
5. Individuals previously incapable of acquiring mortgages or large credit lines acquired both.
After these decisions were implemented, many individuals and institutions began defaulting on their credit payment obligations; home and business owners proved incapable of meeting the terms of their ARM lending agreements, and subsequently suffered the inception of foreclosure procedures against their properties; credit firms and mortgage firms began to suffer as defaults piled up; institutions that had invested in such credit and mortgage firms began suffering as their investments tanked; and confidence in the global economy at stock exchanges around the world declined.
Consequently, three things have happened: individuals have lost their homes and found themselves in debt; the institutions (JP Morgan, Citibank, etc.) that suffered as a result of bad investments have taken steps to weather this current "crisis" -- they have made corrections in their investment strategies and secured funding from other investment houses and governments to offset their losses; and, governments, especially our government, have wrung their hands about creating a "stimulus" package to protect the US economy against further decline and to lessen the impact of the decline on individual US citizens, particularly the "middle class" and "working class".
I am highly skeptical of any "economic stimulus" package put together by our government for two reasons.
First, I don't think it's appropriate for the government to intervene in this situation in a manner that would obscure or soften the consequences of bad decisionmaking by actors in this economy. People shouldn't spend to the limit on their Capital One credit cards, and they shouldn't take on shady mortgages that promise low teaser interest rates and low/no downpayments on the front end with potentially huge interest rates on the back end. Don't know what the LIBOR is, and didn't bother to look it up before signing the mortgage papers? Well, now you have to learn the hard way to read before signing.
Institutions should have to take the steps they are already taking to correct investment strategy errors. For some, if that means going out of business, so be it -- that's the way the economy works, no?
Second, the US government should not pretend to address softness in the economy by doling out small amounts of money on the false premise that it's going to have a significant impact on the economy. It won't. Will it make me feel good for a day to hold that check? Yes. Might it prop up the sales of Best Buy or Circuit City for a week? Yes. Will it fix the problems that afflict our economy? Not a chance.
Will someone please explain to me why I'm wrong?
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Ruh, roh
Heard from my new job today. Turns out my department is having an offsite the second week I'm there and I'll be going of course. And for the third time in under two years, I will be going to San Diego for work.
It's times like these that I think of Josh and am reminded of these lines from John Donne:
Therefore, send not to know
For whom the bell tolls,
It tolls for thee.
Sorry, buddy. I'll be in town Feb 18-20. Will send details when I have them.
It's times like these that I think of Josh and am reminded of these lines from John Donne:
Therefore, send not to know
For whom the bell tolls,
It tolls for thee.
Sorry, buddy. I'll be in town Feb 18-20. Will send details when I have them.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
What a f***ing waste......
Heath Ledger, a prodigious acting talent, and one of my favorite actors, died today in New York City. New York is actually so entertainment-obsessed that his death led the local news.
Heath joins the roster of Hollywood talents who have found death too young. He was only 28.
But all I can think is, there's another 2-year old without a father for the rest of her life.
It's been reported in the New York Times that prescription sleeping pills were found in his bedroom. If he overdosed, he deserves a kick in the head, even if he is already dead.
Heath joins the roster of Hollywood talents who have found death too young. He was only 28.
But all I can think is, there's another 2-year old without a father for the rest of her life.
It's been reported in the New York Times that prescription sleeping pills were found in his bedroom. If he overdosed, he deserves a kick in the head, even if he is already dead.
Saturday, January 19, 2008
25 Days, 11 hrs, and counting...
...until pitchers and catchers report to Spring Training. And, as I write this, I'm watching the 2007 World Series Film on my DVR. Damn, it's good to be a Red Sox fan in the early years of the 21st century.
2003 -- won ALDS; lost ALCS in 7 (thanks, Grady Little)
2004 -- won ALDS; won ALCS; World Series Champions
2005 -- lost in ALDS to eventual World Champions
2006 -- no playoffs
2007 -- won ALDS; won ALCS; World Series Champions
2008 -- the future's so bright, Jacoby Ellsbury's got to wear shades.......
2003 -- won ALDS; lost ALCS in 7 (thanks, Grady Little)
2004 -- won ALDS; won ALCS; World Series Champions
2005 -- lost in ALDS to eventual World Champions
2006 -- no playoffs
2007 -- won ALDS; won ALCS; World Series Champions
2008 -- the future's so bright, Jacoby Ellsbury's got to wear shades.......
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
The Man Speaks
Paul S. Williams and I discuss AU athletics - specifically men's basketball - Jim Harrick, Sharkleberry Finn Kool Aid, Tang, PAO IV on the Floor and more in the latest installment of the Malt Shop Logic Podcast.
Friday, January 11, 2008
From Bill Simmons' column today.
The Where-Did-Andy-Dufresne-Get-A-Ziploc-Bag Award for "Best out-of-nowhere revelation I had about a movie that I had already seen 300 times"
During breaks in the Skins-Hawks game, I was flicking over to "Beverly Hills Cop" on one of the HD channels, and maybe it was seeing Jenny Summers' come-hither smirk in high definition for the first time, but how did I never notice the smoldering sexual tension in the scene when Axel brings his old friend Jenny back to his Beverly Hills hotel room and she lays down on his bed and bats her eyelashes at him for a couple of minutes? For God's sake, she did everything but take her clothes off and assume the missionary position, and yet Axel was more interested in ordering room service for Taggart and Rosewood. I don't get it.
Which leads me to my $64,000 question: Was Axel Foley secretly gay?
In the first two "Cop" movies (I refuse to admit that "Cop 3" happened), Axel didn't have a girlfriend, and we never saw him hook up with a single girl. In "Cop 1," he convincingly pretended to be Victor Maitlin's lover in a public restaurant. In "Cop 2," he ruined what could have been a fantastic time for his buddies at the Playboy Mansion by starting a fight for no real reason with a suspected bank robber. In "Cop 1," he made Taggart and Rosewood follow him to a strip joint, almost like he was overcompensating, then spent more time looking around the club than looking at the girls. In both "Cop" movies, he ably served as a platonic friend for Jenny and Lt. Bogomil's daughter (without ever making a move on either of them); he clicked with two obviously gay characters (the ones played by Damon Wayans and Bronson Pinchot); and he loved playing a perverse cat-and-mouse game with Taggart and Rosewood (two guys). And he was willing to risk his job and his life to avenge the murder of his old "buddy" Mikey, who just happened to be coming back to "crash" at Axel's apartment on the night he was murdered. We're sure Axel Foley was straight? We're sure?
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Pay the damn bill
I bet Close is glad he's got a new job, so he doesn't have to explain this example of gross imcompetence by the FBI.
Thursday, January 03, 2008
Podcasting is God's Way of Saying "I hate you."
There are so many things that can wrong with a true podcast. Before I start offering help, what software are you kids running to listen to it? iTunes? WinAMP? Windows Media Player? Don't know?
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
Podcast file...
If you are (like me) having trouble with the podcast at archive.org, go directly to its FTP download site here.
Oddly, I seem to have the best luck by right-clicking on the link and opening in a new window.
You'll see a list of files, at the bottom of which is the .mp3 file. Left-click to open and listen, or right-click to download.
I guarantee it's worth a listen. After listening to it, I thought of a hundred other things I'd like to add. Close, time to fire up another podcast, baby! Josh, help us out, brother.
Oddly, I seem to have the best luck by right-clicking on the link and opening in a new window.
You'll see a list of files, at the bottom of which is the .mp3 file. Left-click to open and listen, or right-click to download.
I guarantee it's worth a listen. After listening to it, I thought of a hundred other things I'd like to add. Close, time to fire up another podcast, baby! Josh, help us out, brother.
Friday, December 28, 2007
Malt Shop Logic Podcast
So I may have more time on my hand than is appropriate, but I thought this blog needed a podcast. Follow this link to hear me and Chapin discuss the Patriots, MLS, Mo Money Mo Problems, Tom Bullock, and crappy bands that Brian liked, among other things.
(The streams on the left may provide a better listen - it's a free service, what can you do?).
(Theoretically you can download this to your IPOD, but why would you?)
(The streams on the left may provide a better listen - it's a free service, what can you do?).
(Theoretically you can download this to your IPOD, but why would you?)
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Merry Christmas, Boys (and Girls)
Cherie, Audrey, and I hope you all have enjoyed the spirit of this season and the love of family and friends.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
From the Frozen Lands of Nador...er, Chicago....
1. It was truly a flight against all odds. Saturday afternoon, a sprawling and violent storm spanned the distance from Texas to New York. We were flying Southwest, whose notoriously lean fleet of airplanes leaves it subject to delays even in mild weather. And snow was already falling in Chicago and leading to 2.5 hr delays at O'Hare. But somehow, we landed at Midway 15 minutes early. Go figure.
2. Audrey, on only her second flight ever (the first being about a year ago), and despite having a sudden ear infection, did great...until landing. Her ears must have popped, for she began screaming like she'd been touched with a hot poker. Cherie tried to comfort her for a while, and then I grabbed her...and she promptly vomited all over me. That's twice in 4 weeks. And I'm not talking spit-up -- I'm talking VOMIT. But, as soon as we got her off the plane, she was fine.
3. I met Mr. Close last night for dinner at Buffalo Wild Wings. We drank beers, swapped stories, talked about our mutual victimization via corporate reorganization (more on that later), and between us scarfed down 36 wings with 3 different sauces. We eyed a nearby Golden Tee Live machine, but realized that if we began playing, we'd be out all night, hammered, reeking of cigarette smoke, and wandering in the door at 2 a.m. As attractive as that sounds, we both realized the women in our lives would kill us upon our return. So, we sobered up and departed at a reasonable hour. Growing up blows.
4. The Raven Homestead has a new location -- "Shorewood Glen", a "Del Webb/Pulte Homes Community". Cherie's mom and dad recently purchased a new home in Shorewood Glen, a "55 and over" community. It is a self-contained gated housing development for those in or approaching their "golden years". It has a club, a fitness center, an "Activities Director", and playgrounds, ball fields, and a sledding hill for the grandchildren, you name a convenience, it has it. Much like Stew Leonard's grocery store, filled with animatronic characters singing the virtues of Chiquita bananas and Poland Spring water, I can't decide whether the "all-inclusive" retirement community is a very cool thing or just a little bit evil.
5. It's cold here. Damn cold. 9 degrees cold. And windy. The dry, crystalline, wind-whipped snow has given the landscape here the appearance of a perfectly white desert. I don't think I've spent more than 5 total minutes outside in 4 days.
2. Audrey, on only her second flight ever (the first being about a year ago), and despite having a sudden ear infection, did great...until landing. Her ears must have popped, for she began screaming like she'd been touched with a hot poker. Cherie tried to comfort her for a while, and then I grabbed her...and she promptly vomited all over me. That's twice in 4 weeks. And I'm not talking spit-up -- I'm talking VOMIT. But, as soon as we got her off the plane, she was fine.
3. I met Mr. Close last night for dinner at Buffalo Wild Wings. We drank beers, swapped stories, talked about our mutual victimization via corporate reorganization (more on that later), and between us scarfed down 36 wings with 3 different sauces. We eyed a nearby Golden Tee Live machine, but realized that if we began playing, we'd be out all night, hammered, reeking of cigarette smoke, and wandering in the door at 2 a.m. As attractive as that sounds, we both realized the women in our lives would kill us upon our return. So, we sobered up and departed at a reasonable hour. Growing up blows.
4. The Raven Homestead has a new location -- "Shorewood Glen", a "Del Webb/Pulte Homes Community". Cherie's mom and dad recently purchased a new home in Shorewood Glen, a "55 and over" community. It is a self-contained gated housing development for those in or approaching their "golden years". It has a club, a fitness center, an "Activities Director", and playgrounds, ball fields, and a sledding hill for the grandchildren, you name a convenience, it has it. Much like Stew Leonard's grocery store, filled with animatronic characters singing the virtues of Chiquita bananas and Poland Spring water, I can't decide whether the "all-inclusive" retirement community is a very cool thing or just a little bit evil.
5. It's cold here. Damn cold. 9 degrees cold. And windy. The dry, crystalline, wind-whipped snow has given the landscape here the appearance of a perfectly white desert. I don't think I've spent more than 5 total minutes outside in 4 days.
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
The "Boo, You're Terrible" Tour is coming to your town...
Which town?
HOG Butcher for the World
Tool Maker
Stacker of Wheat
Player with Railroads
The Nation's Freight Handler
Stormy, husky, brawling,
City of the Big Shoulders:
CHICAGO!
The entire family will be in town beginning Saturday and ending Wednesday.
Close, your cell phone will be ringing shortly. I will be expecting the Old Style to be chilled.
Oo-ra, Chapin out.
HOG Butcher for the World
Tool Maker
Stacker of Wheat
Player with Railroads
The Nation's Freight Handler
Stormy, husky, brawling,
City of the Big Shoulders:
CHICAGO!
The entire family will be in town beginning Saturday and ending Wednesday.
Close, your cell phone will be ringing shortly. I will be expecting the Old Style to be chilled.
Oo-ra, Chapin out.
Sunday, December 09, 2007
Global warming hits home
So I picked up some kind of a stomach bug on Thursday. By Thursday night, it was coming out both ends. By Friday, I was down to rear only (partly because I stopped putting anything in the other end). It slowed down by Saturday, and I just felt kinda crappy (pun intended). By today (Sunday) I was down to monumental amounts of farting.
Seriously. I suspect that it's only a matter of time before Al Gore has a PowerPoint slide dedicated to my ass.
Seriously. I suspect that it's only a matter of time before Al Gore has a PowerPoint slide dedicated to my ass.
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
I Need a Snowblower and Boots
We were supposed to get 3-5 inches of snow last night. We in fact got 7. This caused two problems:
1. I do not own a pair of boots. In fact, I can't remember the last time I owned a pair of boots. You could always get away with not having boots in DC. You can't really do that in Illinois, which I realized last winter, but chose to ignore. But when you have to walk a dog through 7 inches of snow, it's hard to ignore.
2. With my house, I purchased an LAD - Long Ass Driveway. I spent a significant amount of time this morning shoveling and am starting to feel it. Of course, as soon as I buy a snowblower, there will be no more snow. It's a conundrum.
That is all.
1. I do not own a pair of boots. In fact, I can't remember the last time I owned a pair of boots. You could always get away with not having boots in DC. You can't really do that in Illinois, which I realized last winter, but chose to ignore. But when you have to walk a dog through 7 inches of snow, it's hard to ignore.
2. With my house, I purchased an LAD - Long Ass Driveway. I spent a significant amount of time this morning shoveling and am starting to feel it. Of course, as soon as I buy a snowblower, there will be no more snow. It's a conundrum.
That is all.
Monday, December 03, 2007
Weird
I've been mulling this over for a while now every time I see a Cadillac commercial, but isn't it a little weird that Cadillac is trying to be cool(er) these days with flashy (for lack of a better word) commercials that feature a rock song from 1994.
The only reason that I am even interested in this is that the song is by a band called Hum, which came out of Champaign in 1994. Their song, Stars (or something like that) got some fairly heavy airplay in Chicago that summer (catchy first couple lines: She thinks she missed the train to Mars/She's out back counting stars) thanks mostly to the hook that is in the commercial. Which I have to say, stands up pretty well even today.
I have their crappily produced CD that I need to turn my IPod up all the way to hear adequately when Stars comes on. Only one other decent song on there. But what is Stars doing in a Cadillac commercial?
Maybe this is what Chapin was talking about a few months back - the soundtracks of our lives being used to get us to buy things now. I'm old.
The only reason that I am even interested in this is that the song is by a band called Hum, which came out of Champaign in 1994. Their song, Stars (or something like that) got some fairly heavy airplay in Chicago that summer (catchy first couple lines: She thinks she missed the train to Mars/She's out back counting stars) thanks mostly to the hook that is in the commercial. Which I have to say, stands up pretty well even today.
I have their crappily produced CD that I need to turn my IPod up all the way to hear adequately when Stars comes on. Only one other decent song on there. But what is Stars doing in a Cadillac commercial?
Maybe this is what Chapin was talking about a few months back - the soundtracks of our lives being used to get us to buy things now. I'm old.
Saturday, December 01, 2007
Happy Birthday To Me Haiku
Sing "Sweet Caroline..."
The baby sings, "Oh, Oh, Oh"
A Sox Fan is Born!
I am thirty three
A Happy Birthday to me
Bin ich deutsch Bier getranken (I drank German beer -- 5 syllables, you like?)
6 Rivington, yes?
Loreley is a fine place
I like their Schnitzel
I am thirty three
One more year, I outlive Christ
Please forgive me Lord
I Still Smell Candy
Surprise, She smells like a skank
So Long Ago, Yes?
Matt Lewis was banned
The skanky strippers were tanned
And smelled worse naked
The baby sings, "Oh, Oh, Oh"
A Sox Fan is Born!
I am thirty three
A Happy Birthday to me
Bin ich deutsch Bier getranken (I drank German beer -- 5 syllables, you like?)
6 Rivington, yes?
Loreley is a fine place
I like their Schnitzel
I am thirty three
One more year, I outlive Christ
Please forgive me Lord
I Still Smell Candy
Surprise, She smells like a skank
So Long Ago, Yes?
Matt Lewis was banned
The skanky strippers were tanned
And smelled worse naked
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Friday, November 16, 2007
Was/Dal
I've got both Cooley and Witten on my fantasy roster. Who should get the start?
By the way -- Team Highfalls (colors green and gold, like the Genny Cream Ale can) has drunkenly stumbled its way to first in its league, the BFDFL, which awards its winner the Conrad Dobler Trophy... not bad for an owner who hasn't watched an NFL game in two and a half seasons.
By the way -- Team Highfalls (colors green and gold, like the Genny Cream Ale can) has drunkenly stumbled its way to first in its league, the BFDFL, which awards its winner the Conrad Dobler Trophy... not bad for an owner who hasn't watched an NFL game in two and a half seasons.
Saturday, November 10, 2007
Victory Scotch
To my left is what can only be described as a victory scotch in celebration of Illinois' victory over #1 Ohio State today. Simply, Illinois' turnaround this season has been nothing short of miraculous, and they quite frankly dominated Ohio State for the most part. Makes you wonder what kind of season they could have had if the Illini hadn't pissed away the Iowa and Michigan games.
Other items of note:
Other items of note:
- We adopted a dog today. She's 7 years old, but fits our lifestyle as we didn't think it would be fair to leave a puppy home alone all day.
- On my IPod lately - Arcade Fire (yes, I'm late to the party), though I can't help but think every time I listen to their latest album that I'm listening to a concept album; and Spoon, which once your past the first two songs on their album is really good (though Billy Joel called and would like his sound back)
- Cubs=Pathetic Playoff Team
- Chapin=Red Sox Nation=Why We All Hate Red Sox Nation Now
- A note on AU's "TV" schedule for Men's basketball - if less than 2% of the country can see your games on TV, it's not a TV schedule.
- There are few things more enjoyable in life than Notre Dame sucking like the biggest sucks who ever sucked. Reminds me of the heady days of BC over Notre Dame and Northwestern over Notre Dame, but every week!
That is all.
Sunday, November 04, 2007
For you NFL fans...
Thoughts/questions on this week's happenings:
1. I believe in recycling, fluorescent light bulbs, renewable energy, etc. -- and not to save the Polar Bears, but because I like this planet and think we should improve it for our own selfish enjoyment of it.
Having said that...how stupid, pointless, and contrived was NBC's decision to turn out the studio lights during Sunday Night Football so you could not see Chris Collinsworth, Bob Costas, and Tiki Barber? How much more energy did they burn by sending moron Matt Lauer to the Arctic Circle and then burning spotlights in the Arctic so he could be seen?
2. How crazy is it to see Detroit with six wins, trailing only the geezer-Favre-led Packers in the NFC North?? Detroit only had 8 wins in the last 2 seasons combined! PS, I have always liked Jon Kitna, and am glad to see him leading the Lions back into contention.
3. Is it just me, or does Kellen Clemens of the New York Jets look like another unheralded QB about to make it big? He's big, with a strong arm, looks like he's becoming more accurate and comfortable in the pocket, and boy, can he run. He looked pretty good against the Redskins today...but...
4. Are the Redskins the worst 5-3 team in the NFL this year (also the Browns, Jags)? I'm still not buying Jason Campbell (at all) as a good NFL starting QB, and frankly, they only won today because of the inexplicable inability of the Jets to score after winning the overtime coin toss today.
5. Why are the Bengals so bad? When you give up 33 points to the Bills, you qualify as woeful.
6. Did any of you stay up to see the Cowboys-Eagles game and see Jason Witten!?! He took a hit after catching a pass, his helmet popped off, and he kept running another 30 yds before being tackled. Damn, that guy's tougher than nails. Madden loved it. Witten guaranteed a spot on the 2007 All-Madden Team with that one play.
7. Does 2004-2007-beyond strike any of you as an eerie baseball parallel for my Red Sox to the mid-90s for the Dallas Cowboys, when one of my teams was so good that it made me nearly insufferable to be around?
8. Paul -- just how big is the lovefest with Tony Romo down there in Big D? Damn, that boy is good -- and he may have the whitest teeth (and most teeth) of any QB in the NFL.
9. Close -- is there any hope for your Bears? I actually like Brian Griese and have always thought he's been disrespected and under-rated, but is your team revealing themselves to be fraudulent, as everyone suspected them of being even when they were the worst 13-3 team in the NFL (and not just the victim of Rex Grossman's consistent inconsistency)?
1. I believe in recycling, fluorescent light bulbs, renewable energy, etc. -- and not to save the Polar Bears, but because I like this planet and think we should improve it for our own selfish enjoyment of it.
Having said that...how stupid, pointless, and contrived was NBC's decision to turn out the studio lights during Sunday Night Football so you could not see Chris Collinsworth, Bob Costas, and Tiki Barber? How much more energy did they burn by sending moron Matt Lauer to the Arctic Circle and then burning spotlights in the Arctic so he could be seen?
2. How crazy is it to see Detroit with six wins, trailing only the geezer-Favre-led Packers in the NFC North?? Detroit only had 8 wins in the last 2 seasons combined! PS, I have always liked Jon Kitna, and am glad to see him leading the Lions back into contention.
3. Is it just me, or does Kellen Clemens of the New York Jets look like another unheralded QB about to make it big? He's big, with a strong arm, looks like he's becoming more accurate and comfortable in the pocket, and boy, can he run. He looked pretty good against the Redskins today...but...
4. Are the Redskins the worst 5-3 team in the NFL this year (also the Browns, Jags)? I'm still not buying Jason Campbell (at all) as a good NFL starting QB, and frankly, they only won today because of the inexplicable inability of the Jets to score after winning the overtime coin toss today.
5. Why are the Bengals so bad? When you give up 33 points to the Bills, you qualify as woeful.
6. Did any of you stay up to see the Cowboys-Eagles game and see Jason Witten!?! He took a hit after catching a pass, his helmet popped off, and he kept running another 30 yds before being tackled. Damn, that guy's tougher than nails. Madden loved it. Witten guaranteed a spot on the 2007 All-Madden Team with that one play.
7. Does 2004-2007-beyond strike any of you as an eerie baseball parallel for my Red Sox to the mid-90s for the Dallas Cowboys, when one of my teams was so good that it made me nearly insufferable to be around?
8. Paul -- just how big is the lovefest with Tony Romo down there in Big D? Damn, that boy is good -- and he may have the whitest teeth (and most teeth) of any QB in the NFL.
9. Close -- is there any hope for your Bears? I actually like Brian Griese and have always thought he's been disrespected and under-rated, but is your team revealing themselves to be fraudulent, as everyone suspected them of being even when they were the worst 13-3 team in the NFL (and not just the victim of Rex Grossman's consistent inconsistency)?
Saturday, November 03, 2007
Best Line of the Week...
Stephen Colbert, on the Colorado Rockies' attempt to copyright "Rocktober".
"Colorado, if you want a month of your own, I've already reserved 'Choketember'!"
"Colorado, if you want a month of your own, I've already reserved 'Choketember'!"
Monday, October 29, 2007
Yanking Chapin's Chain
Grew up in Upstate NY hating NYY. It's an upstate/downstate thing. Pretty much everything from Albany east ought to get cut off and dumped into the Atlantic, the Yankees included. No one would miss Poughkeepsie or George Steinbrenner.
However: Since moving back here in '02 I have found myself more and more tolerant of the pinstriped team and its fans -- even tune into a key game or two and root them on. I don't get that excited about it (AL ball doesn't do a whole lot for me, and sports don't generally determine my quality of life one way or the other).
Wonder why?
Maybe because, everywhere I've encountered it, and especially since the first WS win, Red Sox Nation is populated with more than its fare share of chirpy bitches. Yankee fans may be arrogant, but at least it's an arrogance born of a long tradition of success... and when things go poorly, they look to their team and its management for change. On the other hand, it's hard to sit in a bar around here without some yoho in a Red Sox cap whining about the Yankees' payroll. It gets old in a hurry.
Chaps, the bright side is, you're a thoughtful Sox fan, and tolerable. Which puts you in a league apart from many of your compatriots.
Red Sox fans = chirpy bitches with a chip on their shoulder. Discuss.
However: Since moving back here in '02 I have found myself more and more tolerant of the pinstriped team and its fans -- even tune into a key game or two and root them on. I don't get that excited about it (AL ball doesn't do a whole lot for me, and sports don't generally determine my quality of life one way or the other).
Wonder why?
Maybe because, everywhere I've encountered it, and especially since the first WS win, Red Sox Nation is populated with more than its fare share of chirpy bitches. Yankee fans may be arrogant, but at least it's an arrogance born of a long tradition of success... and when things go poorly, they look to their team and its management for change. On the other hand, it's hard to sit in a bar around here without some yoho in a Red Sox cap whining about the Yankees' payroll. It gets old in a hurry.
Chaps, the bright side is, you're a thoughtful Sox fan, and tolerable. Which puts you in a league apart from many of your compatriots.
Red Sox fans = chirpy bitches with a chip on their shoulder. Discuss.
Perfection...
4 games, 4 wins, 1 World Series Championship. And Pearl Jam to serenade Mike Lowell, the Series MVP. Perfection indeed.
Boston -- see you on Tuesday!
PS -- Mr. Close -- a jig was danced at 166 Old Brookfield Road tonight. May you get to do the same next year.
Boston -- see you on Tuesday!
PS -- Mr. Close -- a jig was danced at 166 Old Brookfield Road tonight. May you get to do the same next year.
Sunday, October 28, 2007
1 Win to Go!
The Boston Red Sox stand on the verge of their 2nd World Series championship in 4 years!!!
In their first road game of this series, the Red Sox survived a Rockie rally to win their 3rd straight World Series game, 10-5.
Tonight's game was a demonstration of two trends that have combined to provide the foundation for Boston's postseason success. First, the Red Sox continued their recent streak of shooting to early leads by pummeling Josh Fogg and taking a 6-0 lead in the 3rd inning.
Second, the Red Sox displayed resilience and unflappability. In a hostile ballpark, after surrendering 5 runs and seeing their lead reduced to 1 run at 6-5, the Red Sox scored 4 unanswered runs in the 8th and 9th to take a 5-run lead into the bottom of the 9th. Then, despite suffering from the altitude, Jonathan "Riverdance" Papelbon put the game away by retiring 3 out of 4 batters and surrendering only one base hit, and no runs.
With that, my Sox have:
1. Won 6 games in a row (last 3 of the ALCS, first 3 of the WS);
2. Won 10 of their last 13;
3. Guaranteed that in a worst case scenario, even if they lose the next two at Coors, they will go back to Fenway with the Series lead.
4. Put themselves in the position to sweep their second World Series in 4 years.
Simply awesome.
In their first road game of this series, the Red Sox survived a Rockie rally to win their 3rd straight World Series game, 10-5.
Tonight's game was a demonstration of two trends that have combined to provide the foundation for Boston's postseason success. First, the Red Sox continued their recent streak of shooting to early leads by pummeling Josh Fogg and taking a 6-0 lead in the 3rd inning.
Second, the Red Sox displayed resilience and unflappability. In a hostile ballpark, after surrendering 5 runs and seeing their lead reduced to 1 run at 6-5, the Red Sox scored 4 unanswered runs in the 8th and 9th to take a 5-run lead into the bottom of the 9th. Then, despite suffering from the altitude, Jonathan "Riverdance" Papelbon put the game away by retiring 3 out of 4 batters and surrendering only one base hit, and no runs.
With that, my Sox have:
1. Won 6 games in a row (last 3 of the ALCS, first 3 of the WS);
2. Won 10 of their last 13;
3. Guaranteed that in a worst case scenario, even if they lose the next two at Coors, they will go back to Fenway with the Series lead.
4. Put themselves in the position to sweep their second World Series in 4 years.
Simply awesome.
Friday, October 26, 2007
2 Down, 2 to Go!
Schilling+Okajima+Papelbon = Game 2 victory.
Two more wins, and I'll be headed to Boston for another parade.
Let's Go Red Sox! Let's Go Red Sox! Let's Go Red Sox!
Two more wins, and I'll be headed to Boston for another parade.
Let's Go Red Sox! Let's Go Red Sox! Let's Go Red Sox!
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Home Again
Thank you all for your calls and well wishes. I made it home today to find my house sans scorch marks. A little smoky smelling, but I've had it airing out all day. Fortunately, I'm close enough to the shore that I get a slight breeze keeping the smoke from my area. Unfortunately, the air quality is going to be quite unhealthy for the next week or so.
Monday, October 22, 2007
The Fires in SoCal
If you're curious, I'm updating my most recent entry on the other site regarding location of the nearest fire and where to get information.
Sunday, October 21, 2007
Behold the Mighty Red Sox!
For the 3rd time in 5 years, the Red Sox entered the ALCS.
For the 2nd time 3 attempts, they are CHAMPIONS OF THE AMERICAN LEAGUE!!!!
And, they are IN THE WORLD SERIES, BABY!!!!
Oh, it is SO SWEET!
My brother and Cherie's sister live in Boston, we're 2 hours away by car, and you best believe we'll be in Boston for another victory party if and when it happens!!
For the 2nd time 3 attempts, they are CHAMPIONS OF THE AMERICAN LEAGUE!!!!
And, they are IN THE WORLD SERIES, BABY!!!!
Oh, it is SO SWEET!
My brother and Cherie's sister live in Boston, we're 2 hours away by car, and you best believe we'll be in Boston for another victory party if and when it happens!!
Thursday, October 18, 2007
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD...
...will Fox please, please, please retire Tim McCarver?!?!?!?!
That's 6, no 10, no 9 men in a row retired by Beckett...
Grady's 2-4...I mean 1-4...
That's a double...no, a triple...by Youkilis.
This man is incapable of getting the basics right when broadcasting. He's a god-damn embarrassment.
And could Joe Buck be a bigger p***y?
Jeez, I hate Fox's baseball broadcasters.
That's 6, no 10, no 9 men in a row retired by Beckett...
Grady's 2-4...I mean 1-4...
That's a double...no, a triple...by Youkilis.
This man is incapable of getting the basics right when broadcasting. He's a god-damn embarrassment.
And could Joe Buck be a bigger p***y?
Jeez, I hate Fox's baseball broadcasters.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Saturday, October 13, 2007
Voop, voop, bitches...
Back from out of town just in time to see my Red Sox despoil the Indians, 10-3. Papi and Manny took the Voop in hand and smacked the war paint right off 'dem Indians. 1 down, 3 to go.
Respectfully submitted,
M.F.V.
Respectfully submitted,
M.F.V.
Saturday, October 06, 2007
Oh, I think I understand...
...that you should BEWARE THE MANNY!!!!!!
2-0, bitches.
Oh, what's that, the Cubs are DOWN 2-0? Again, I think that puts them in the category of teams that suck like a Hoover.
GO RED SOX!!!!!!
Beer is good.
2-0, bitches.
Oh, what's that, the Cubs are DOWN 2-0? Again, I think that puts them in the category of teams that suck like a Hoover.
GO RED SOX!!!!!!
Beer is good.
Thursday, October 04, 2007
Clearly chaps misunderstands...
Speaking of which, I was thinking of elements of my life that have and have not changed since the last time the Cubs made the playoffs.
For one thing, I use the word "tallboy" a lot less.
For another, I don't have squirrels living in the roof.
On the other hand some things haven't changed; I still have pothead old lady neighbors; and it's still fun to play the giant-spotlight game with teenagers as they drive by late at night.
p.s. speaking of back in the day, anyone know a Jennifer (Jenn) Owens, who is apparently AU SOC/SPA '97 or so? She was among the interviewers I faced today for a community leadership gig here in the Syr... and is the only other person I've met who was both a CLEG and PJ major undergrad.
For one thing, I use the word "tallboy" a lot less.
For another, I don't have squirrels living in the roof.
On the other hand some things haven't changed; I still have pothead old lady neighbors; and it's still fun to play the giant-spotlight game with teenagers as they drive by late at night.
p.s. speaking of back in the day, anyone know a Jennifer (Jenn) Owens, who is apparently AU SOC/SPA '97 or so? She was among the interviewers I faced today for a community leadership gig here in the Syr... and is the only other person I've met who was both a CLEG and PJ major undergrad.
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
Admirable cultural parallels
There are two kinds of people in this world: people who suck, and the Chicago Cubs.
The Chicago Cubs spends their Saturdays climbing mountains and meditating in peaceful solitude. Sundays are for oral sex, KFC and
Old Styles.
Chicago Cubs always have sex on the first date. Always.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures the Chicago Cubs allow to live.
When the Chicago Cubs go to donate blood, they decline the syringe, and instead request a handgun and a bucket.
The Chicago Cubs once walked down the street with massive erections. There were no survivors.
The Chicago Cubs have two speeds: walk and kill.
The Chicago Cubs are the only men to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
As Chicago Cubs are born, the nurse says, "Holy crap! That's a Chicago Cub!" Then she has sex with him. At that point, she will be the third girl he has slept with.
Chicago Cubs can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
It takes the Chicago Cubs 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
The Chicago Cubs are not lactose intolerant, they just refuse to put up with lactose's shit.
The Chicago Cubs can divide by zero.
When the Chicago Cubs do pushups, they aren't lifting themselves up, they're pushing the Earth down.
The Chicago Cubs can piss into gale force winds.
The Chicago Cubs do not teabag the ladies. They potato-sack them.
The Chicago Cubs once bet NASA they could survive re-entry without spacesuits. On September 29, 1998, the Chicago Cubs re-entered the earth's atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publicly claimed it was a meteor, and still owes the Chicago Cubs a beer.
The Chicago Cubs doesn't shave; they kick themselves in the face. The only thing that can cut the Chicago Cubs is the Chicago Cubs.
The Chicago Cubs do not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. The Chicago Cubs go killing.
Bullets dodge the Chicago Cubs.
The Chicago Cubs' bobblehead dolls have slept with more women then most men.
The Chicago Cubs recently had the idea to sell their urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.
The Chicago Cubs spends their Saturdays climbing mountains and meditating in peaceful solitude. Sundays are for oral sex, KFC and
Old Styles.
Chicago Cubs always have sex on the first date. Always.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures the Chicago Cubs allow to live.
When the Chicago Cubs go to donate blood, they decline the syringe, and instead request a handgun and a bucket.
The Chicago Cubs once walked down the street with massive erections. There were no survivors.
The Chicago Cubs have two speeds: walk and kill.
The Chicago Cubs are the only men to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
As Chicago Cubs are born, the nurse says, "Holy crap! That's a Chicago Cub!" Then she has sex with him. At that point, she will be the third girl he has slept with.
Chicago Cubs can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
It takes the Chicago Cubs 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
The Chicago Cubs are not lactose intolerant, they just refuse to put up with lactose's shit.
The Chicago Cubs can divide by zero.
When the Chicago Cubs do pushups, they aren't lifting themselves up, they're pushing the Earth down.
The Chicago Cubs can piss into gale force winds.
The Chicago Cubs do not teabag the ladies. They potato-sack them.
The Chicago Cubs once bet NASA they could survive re-entry without spacesuits. On September 29, 1998, the Chicago Cubs re-entered the earth's atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publicly claimed it was a meteor, and still owes the Chicago Cubs a beer.
The Chicago Cubs doesn't shave; they kick themselves in the face. The only thing that can cut the Chicago Cubs is the Chicago Cubs.
The Chicago Cubs do not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. The Chicago Cubs go killing.
Bullets dodge the Chicago Cubs.
The Chicago Cubs' bobblehead dolls have slept with more women then most men.
The Chicago Cubs recently had the idea to sell their urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.
Monday, October 01, 2007
Schadenfreude
At the end of the game yesterday, thousands of Chargers fans were heard chanting, "MAR-TY! MAR-TY! MAR-TY!"
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