Deep Throat

So, Deep Throat has been revealed - by Vanity Fair. The amazing thing is not, as Ben Bradlee put it, that his identity stayed secret for so long, it's that the Washingtonian - the Washingtonian! - was so right about the identity in 1974 (via Achenblog).

Undercover Brother

This is both amazing, and hysterical. A few snippets from the article:

The 7-foot-1, 325-pound center was recently sworn in as a U.S. deputy marshal . . .  "I put a lot into it, and when I am done playing, I plan on going undercover and then being the sheriff or chief of police somewhere, either Miami or Orlando, I don't know yet," O'Neal said recently.

Once my laughter subsided at the idea of ole' Shaq doing anything undercover ("I dunno, jefe. He looks like Shaq . . ."), I came to this brilliant piece of understatement from Miami Beach Police Chief De Lucca:

"He'd be a great undercover guy. Obviously, we're not going to send him out to buy dope, but he can do surveillance, he can do Internet crimes."

Again, laughter aside, I'm always impressed with this guy. He's the kind of guy I'd like to buy a beer. Sweet, sweet beer . . .

Hey-ooooo!

Political humor - that is actually funny.

Ich bin ein deutscher E-mail Benutzer, der E-mail von jedermann öffnet.

Oh silly Germans, your Sober Q virus so crazy!

Best. Website. Ever.

Seriously.

Hoaxes

"Unfortunately" was the correct word to use. I didn't mention it as I'd like to think that this group of intelligent men would notice that it's allegedly a BBC article not hosted at bbc.co.uk.

Hoax

Unfortunately, the 42 midgets versus the lion fight thing is a hoax.

RE: Castillo/Corrales

Meh. Here's a better fight: Lion Mutilates 42 Midgets in Cambodian Ring Fight.

Castillo/Corrales

Anyone else see this fight?

For those of you that have Showtime they've been re-running it.

One of the best boxing matches, if not the best boxing match, I've ever seen.

05/07/05 - Haiku Day

Hoffman 400.
Padres better than the Cubs.
Best look out, BoSox.

This horrible attempt at haiku has been brought to you by the lack of season tickets.

In defense of the White Sox

You play who you play. This ain't college football, where you fatten up on the creampuffs of the world before your conference play. We will see how they do in the coming weeks, but they can only beat who is on their schedule.

Unfortunately for the Red Sox, though, the White Sox aren't the only team that gets to play all those bad teams so many times. The Twins do too, which means either team has a good chance at running up enough wins to get the Wild Card.

So your Red Sox better get their act together to catch them Os.

Am I the Only One...

...who believes the Chicago White Sox are COUNTERFEIT?! Much is being made of their 21-7 start, but let us examine them a bit more closely....

Of the six opponents they've faced in series so far, only 1 has a record better than .500. They've played a grand total of 5 games out of 28 against teams with better than .500 records.

The combined record of the teams they've faced is 71-94.

The two teams they've played the most -- 6 times each -- the no-account Indians and sorry Royals -- have a combined record of 18-38. The Royals are 7-21. Talk about padding the early schedule.

But things are about to get harder. During the rest of the month of May, the White Sox will play 19 of 25 games against teams with records above .500.

If they're still 14 games above .500 on June 1, then we can talk about them being a legitimate contender to make the playoffs. But NOT until then.

Tonight on "The Ocho"

Circle Jerk of the Gridiron Stars.

On My Mind

1. It's a lot easier to post to a blog when you know for sure work isn't monitoring your computer use. The new job has all these "rules" and "regulations" about computer use, as well as a cadre of employees to ferret out inappropriate use that may or may not include blogger. Let's just assume for now that blogger is not appropriate.

2. Memo to ESPN: you can't make me watch college sports that suck. Yes I am talking about college baseball and, especially, softball.

3. Observation from the Metro - what's with wheeled luggage taking the place of briefcases? They get in my way, and slow me down when people have to drag them up the broken escalators. I saw one person last week with the wheeled briefcase, a big purse, and lunch bag. What could they possibly have in the luggage?

4. Why would a host ask you to take off your shoes to enter the house, then allow a dog owned by someone else to run free in said house even after walks outside on a wet night?

5. They cleaned up RFK pretty nice for baseball, but that was a weak turnout last night for the game. Very empty.

6. Free Tim Fudd!