Wednesday, February 24, 2010
The Malt Shop Brings All the Boys to the Yard (of former Congressmen)
We missed the six year anniversary. And to think, Milk Shakes meant so much more back then.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Guess where I am?
If you guessed the land of weisswurst, the Allgauer Alps, great bier, rahm und wiener schnitzel, schokolade, hot teutonic ski bunnies, and amazing alpine scenery, you guessed correctly.
GERMANY, biatches! GERMANY GERMANY GERMANY GERMANY! Eat it, and come back for seconds!
3 more days of Schneiderweisse, kaiserschmarrn, semmelknodel, Ayinger, Edinger, Schneider, Franziskaner, pommes frites, broetchen, and various foods smothered in cream sauces. Yum.
GOT-TO-LOVE-IT.
Das ist alles. Auf Wiedersehen, dummkopfs.
Oh, and Josh? Congratulations on the birth of Jackson Marley. Jackson Marley? Really? Are you actively trying to get him beat up in middle school? Sheesh.
Ha, just kidding. Congrats to you and Nik. Can't wait to meet the little tyke.
GERMANY, biatches! GERMANY GERMANY GERMANY GERMANY! Eat it, and come back for seconds!
3 more days of Schneiderweisse, kaiserschmarrn, semmelknodel, Ayinger, Edinger, Schneider, Franziskaner, pommes frites, broetchen, and various foods smothered in cream sauces. Yum.
GOT-TO-LOVE-IT.
Das ist alles. Auf Wiedersehen, dummkopfs.
Oh, and Josh? Congratulations on the birth of Jackson Marley. Jackson Marley? Really? Are you actively trying to get him beat up in middle school? Sheesh.
Ha, just kidding. Congrats to you and Nik. Can't wait to meet the little tyke.
Friday, February 12, 2010
Buzzed
For those of you on gmail, you may have noticed the new feature "Buzz". I'm reserving judgement on it insofar as I didn't know I needed it and I'm not sure I want it. However, I do want to inform everyone that, unless it has been fixed, whatever you post here shows up in Buzz as coming from Josh.
If that's not a reason to post more here, I don't know what it is.
If that's not a reason to post more here, I don't know what it is.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Monday, February 08, 2010
Boo, you're terrible!
Two thoughts:
1. As if it wasn't enough that we're already digging out from more than 2 feet of snow, the latest Winter Storm Warning at weather.com predicts another 10-20 inches starting tomorrow. I love snow, but this is a bit much even for me. You can see pics of what our area looks like here;
2. This past week revealed to me the failure of big box retailers to move nimbly in response to local and regional phenomena. It's been no surprise for the last few weeks that the Mid-Atlantic is in an "active" pattern of winter weather destined to continue dumping snow on the DC-MD-VA area (and PA, NJ, NY, NC, etc.). Yet no big box store/national retailer I entered (Target, Toys R Us, Wal-Mart, EMS, REI, etc.) in the past week stocked sleds -- in fact, they had already transitioned their sporting goods departments to spring/summer items. Really, who's thinking of buying softball and baseball bats when you've had snow twice in a week and are staring down the Great Blizzard of 2010?
Anyway, at the last moment on Friday morning, when I'd nearly given up hope, my brother said, "Have you tried the hardware store?" Sure enough, local institution Fischer Hardware was stocked to the gills with sleds, snow shovels, and other winter necessities. I'll be patronizing them more often in the future.
1. As if it wasn't enough that we're already digging out from more than 2 feet of snow, the latest Winter Storm Warning at weather.com predicts another 10-20 inches starting tomorrow. I love snow, but this is a bit much even for me. You can see pics of what our area looks like here;
2. This past week revealed to me the failure of big box retailers to move nimbly in response to local and regional phenomena. It's been no surprise for the last few weeks that the Mid-Atlantic is in an "active" pattern of winter weather destined to continue dumping snow on the DC-MD-VA area (and PA, NJ, NY, NC, etc.). Yet no big box store/national retailer I entered (Target, Toys R Us, Wal-Mart, EMS, REI, etc.) in the past week stocked sleds -- in fact, they had already transitioned their sporting goods departments to spring/summer items. Really, who's thinking of buying softball and baseball bats when you've had snow twice in a week and are staring down the Great Blizzard of 2010?
Anyway, at the last moment on Friday morning, when I'd nearly given up hope, my brother said, "Have you tried the hardware store?" Sure enough, local institution Fischer Hardware was stocked to the gills with sleds, snow shovels, and other winter necessities. I'll be patronizing them more often in the future.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
The passing of an era/This one's for you, Josh...
Back when DVD was new and Josh and I shared a soundproofed apartment (thanks, proximity to National Airport!), I purchased the components for a home theater. Josh and I (and some of you faithful readers) spent many hours with the sound cranked up to "earth-shaking", munching bad pizza from Domino's and watching Gladiator or the Matrix or Heat or Fight Club, or some other testosterone-infused moving picture containing lots of ass-kicking, gunfire, explosions, roaring tigers, or other such manly goodness.
Today, the DVD player component of that rig, the venerable Sony DVP-S530D, finally bit the dust. It was 10 years old or more, and it finally succumbed to the infamous Sony "C 13 00" error, refusing to play discs of any kind.
So, I went to Best Buy and snagged a new Panasonic DMP-BD60 Blu-Ray player, which will nicely complement the flat screen HDTV I intend to purchase in the next week or two. I'm currently back and forth between a 46"/47" LCD TV (either Samsung, Sony, or LG) or a 50"/52" plasma (same brands). Anyone have any experience with these that they'd like to share?
Today, the DVD player component of that rig, the venerable Sony DVP-S530D, finally bit the dust. It was 10 years old or more, and it finally succumbed to the infamous Sony "C 13 00" error, refusing to play discs of any kind.
So, I went to Best Buy and snagged a new Panasonic DMP-BD60 Blu-Ray player, which will nicely complement the flat screen HDTV I intend to purchase in the next week or two. I'm currently back and forth between a 46"/47" LCD TV (either Samsung, Sony, or LG) or a 50"/52" plasma (same brands). Anyone have any experience with these that they'd like to share?
Saturday, January 30, 2010
The Voop's Enduring Power of Inspiration...
The American University Eagles won their third straight and fourth in five games, taking down the first-place Lafayette Leopards with an impressive 10-point road win, 76-66. The Eagles are now only 1 game behind Lafayette for leadership of the Patriot Conference. Could the young Eagles be peaking at the right time, laying the groundwork for a run at the Patriot League title and a 3rd straight berth in the Big Dance?
Stay tuned...
Stay tuned...
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Furrow in the melting snow leads Eagles to victory...
The AU Eagles men's basketball team has been WOEFUL this season. Prior to today, they were 3-14, and had losses to Mount St. Mary's, Md. Eastern Shore, Fairfield, and UMBC among others.
Today, I stepped in to right the ship. Wielding the BFD, twirling it to engage that hypnotic "VOOP" sound, I guided the young Eagles to a state of self-confidence.
"Listen to the VOOP," I told them in a pre-game speech in the bowels of Bender Arena. "The VOOP wants to be victorious. The VOOP wants to you to dunk, to drain the 3, to rebound without mercy -- to excite the chubby, mediocre AU Spirit Dancers in their whorish red dresses that don't cover their too-big, too many late night chicken patty with french fries asses. It wants them to follow YOUR furrows in the snow. Now get out there and make it happen!"
The outcome: a 73-63 victory over the skinnier, white kids from Colgate.
I rest my case.
PS Stephen Lumpkins is the next Brian Gilmore. You heard it here first.
Today, I stepped in to right the ship. Wielding the BFD, twirling it to engage that hypnotic "VOOP" sound, I guided the young Eagles to a state of self-confidence.
"Listen to the VOOP," I told them in a pre-game speech in the bowels of Bender Arena. "The VOOP wants to be victorious. The VOOP wants to you to dunk, to drain the 3, to rebound without mercy -- to excite the chubby, mediocre AU Spirit Dancers in their whorish red dresses that don't cover their too-big, too many late night chicken patty with french fries asses. It wants them to follow YOUR furrows in the snow. Now get out there and make it happen!"
The outcome: a 73-63 victory over the skinnier, white kids from Colgate.
I rest my case.
PS Stephen Lumpkins is the next Brian Gilmore. You heard it here first.
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Anger at atrocious playcalling assuaged by Golden Tee domination...
1. Memo to Wade Phillips: If you repeatedly cannot figure out how to get 3 feet or less on either 3rd or 4th down against the lowly Redskins after having the same exact problem 2 weeks ago, you're not going far in the playoffs.
2. Memo to Jason Garrett: There is no reason for a trick play when you are at midfield, up 14, and jamming the ball down the Skins' throats. Just keep jamming it, instead of putting your team in a 2nd and 23 and forcing it to take unnecessary risks that result in turnovers.
3. Memo to the faithful: my anger at the atrocious playcalling and execution that kept the Cowboys from what should have been a 42-0 demolition of the Redskins was assuaged by the fact that I HOUSED Mr. Close in back-to-back matches of Golden Tee at the Buffalo Wild Wings in Warrenville, IL. Pictures will follow after I download them from my phone.
Merry Christmas to all.
2. Memo to Jason Garrett: There is no reason for a trick play when you are at midfield, up 14, and jamming the ball down the Skins' throats. Just keep jamming it, instead of putting your team in a 2nd and 23 and forcing it to take unnecessary risks that result in turnovers.
3. Memo to the faithful: my anger at the atrocious playcalling and execution that kept the Cowboys from what should have been a 42-0 demolition of the Redskins was assuaged by the fact that I HOUSED Mr. Close in back-to-back matches of Golden Tee at the Buffalo Wild Wings in Warrenville, IL. Pictures will follow after I download them from my phone.
Merry Christmas to all.
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Tuesday, December 08, 2009
Impersonal Delivery of News
So I started out with the goal of contacting people personally, but it turns out that this is much easier. So here it is: my wife is pregnant.
I truly couldn't be happier and can't wait until June 29. Everything has been good so far and we're doing everything we can to make sure it stays that way.
Cross-posted at that other blog
I truly couldn't be happier and can't wait until June 29. Everything has been good so far and we're doing everything we can to make sure it stays that way.
Cross-posted at that other blog
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Not looking good for the Eagles...
The AU Men's Basketball team dropped its 3rd game in a row last night, losing 73-62 to Mount St. Mary's. Yes, we got creamed by Mount St. Mary's. We've now lost consecutive games to St. Francis, Albany, and Mount St. Mary's. It's not looking like a Patriot League Championship year for the Eagles.
I knew this would be a rebuilding year, but I had hoped after the last couple of years and our berths in the Big Dance, our recruiting classes would be strong enough to avoid this poor a start. Oh, well, it least it will be cheap Saturday afternoon entertainment for the munchkins, who will get to hear their dad yell, "Boo, you're terrible, Papparo!"
I knew this would be a rebuilding year, but I had hoped after the last couple of years and our berths in the Big Dance, our recruiting classes would be strong enough to avoid this poor a start. Oh, well, it least it will be cheap Saturday afternoon entertainment for the munchkins, who will get to hear their dad yell, "Boo, you're terrible, Papparo!"
Monday, November 16, 2009
Behold a great twitter feed
A friend at work pointed me towards the greatest fake twitter feed since Barack's Teleprompter started its:
The Fake AP Stylebook
Among my favorites:
The Fake AP Stylebook
Among my favorites:
- Avoid using "gadzooks," lest your monocle pop out and land in your jar of mustache wax.
- The antecedent for "she" in "that's what she said" is generally understood to be "your mom."
- Use the suffix "-ista" to describe someone famous who doesn't really do anything.
Please read.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
That night...
...for those of you who remember how Cherie and I painted our apartments at Columbia Crossing, the Seven Corners Home Depot, where FBI employee Linda Franklin was gunned down by John Allan Muhammad and Lee Boyd Malvo, was "our" Home Depot. It was the store we drove to again and again for paints, brushes, tarps, and the occasional impulse soda buy at the register.
We were headed there that night for more paint. But it had been a long and frustrating day, I was tired, and I convinced Cherie to turn off the path to Home Depot and head back to the apartment. Not long after arriving at home, I turned on the TV and saw the news about Franklin's murder at the very place toward which we'd been headed. Who knows, maybe it saved one of our lives that night. That was what was so frightening about those weeks -- the random nature of the killings and the knowledge that you were totally at the mercy of chance -- maybe it would be you while pumping gas, maybe not.
So good riddance, Muhammad. I hope that even unconscious, you felt your breath slip away. I hope you felt panic at the control taken away from you, at the certainty of your impending death. Like Dennis Miller said, some fuckers are just too evil to be allowed to stay on this earth. Tonight, you joined their ranks.
We were headed there that night for more paint. But it had been a long and frustrating day, I was tired, and I convinced Cherie to turn off the path to Home Depot and head back to the apartment. Not long after arriving at home, I turned on the TV and saw the news about Franklin's murder at the very place toward which we'd been headed. Who knows, maybe it saved one of our lives that night. That was what was so frightening about those weeks -- the random nature of the killings and the knowledge that you were totally at the mercy of chance -- maybe it would be you while pumping gas, maybe not.
So good riddance, Muhammad. I hope that even unconscious, you felt your breath slip away. I hope you felt panic at the control taken away from you, at the certainty of your impending death. Like Dennis Miller said, some fuckers are just too evil to be allowed to stay on this earth. Tonight, you joined their ranks.
Thursday, November 05, 2009
Chron 990
As an alumnus of both The American University and The Chronicle of Higher Education (I am proud of one of those right now)... and as a longtime PR person who was once responsible for pushing The Chronicle's "editorial choices" on to other publications so that they could make the same "disappointing" decisions to publish this factual information...
This letter from our alumni association president looks like a serious case of the university's institutional advancement machine stepping on its own dick.
I bet this wasn't the PR folks' idea, and I feel kind of bad for them. Campaign must not be going well.
From: aualum=american.edu@reply.bronto.com on behalf of AU Alumni Association
To: Matthew Snyder
Subject: Important Message from Your Alumni Association President
Date: Wednesday, November 04, 2009 7:14:19 PM
Dear fellow alumni,
I am writing you today as proud as ever to be an alumnus of American University, and with great confidence in the students, faculty, and leadership of our shared alma mater.
In your local paper, online, or in national publications such as the Wall Street Journal or New York Times, you may have noticed a story that referenced a report in the Chronicle of Higher Education regarding presidential compensation in higher education. Annually, the Chronicle collects and compares data as listed on publicly available IRS Forms 990. On Monday, the Chronicle published a story using the data from 2007–2008, which reported that AU president Neil Kerwin, SPA/BA ’71, received $1,419,339 in total compensation in 2008, ranking third highest in the nation.
Eagle to eagle, you should know that this report of Dr. Kerwin’s income is misleading. Dr. Kerwin’s annual salary, $559,067 in FY2008, historically ranks third among the seven presidents of private research universities in Washington and is moderate in relation to presidents at private universities. The total reported included deferred compensation ($481,304) and investment growth ($318,864) that Dr. Kerwin earned over nearly a decade during his service as provost and interim president. He was required to take the payout when the funds vested, consistent with board policy. It is important to note that each year of the deferred compensation was previously reported on IRS 990 forms and prior surveys as a benefit.
I hope you are able to take a moment to review a communication from AU Board Chairman Gary M. Abramson, SPA/BA ’68, on this subject here.
On behalf of the AU Alumni Association Board, I would like to express my disappointment for the editorial choices utilized by the Chronicle and, subsequently, by other news outlets. During his tenure, Dr. Kerwin has led the university to tremendous financial and academic success and the board’s compensation is especially focused on competitive, market-based compensation that is not excessive. I am proud to be serving as Alumni Board President during this time. I hope that this information is helpful to you, and I encourage you to maintain an open and honest dialogue with your alma mater.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely,Brian F. Keane
This letter from our alumni association president looks like a serious case of the university's institutional advancement machine stepping on its own dick.
I bet this wasn't the PR folks' idea, and I feel kind of bad for them. Campaign must not be going well.
From: aualum=american.edu@reply.bronto.com on behalf of AU Alumni Association
To: Matthew Snyder
Subject: Important Message from Your Alumni Association President
Date: Wednesday, November 04, 2009 7:14:19 PM
Dear fellow alumni,
I am writing you today as proud as ever to be an alumnus of American University, and with great confidence in the students, faculty, and leadership of our shared alma mater.
In your local paper, online, or in national publications such as the Wall Street Journal or New York Times, you may have noticed a story that referenced a report in the Chronicle of Higher Education regarding presidential compensation in higher education. Annually, the Chronicle collects and compares data as listed on publicly available IRS Forms 990. On Monday, the Chronicle published a story using the data from 2007–2008, which reported that AU president Neil Kerwin, SPA/BA ’71, received $1,419,339 in total compensation in 2008, ranking third highest in the nation.
Eagle to eagle, you should know that this report of Dr. Kerwin’s income is misleading. Dr. Kerwin’s annual salary, $559,067 in FY2008, historically ranks third among the seven presidents of private research universities in Washington and is moderate in relation to presidents at private universities. The total reported included deferred compensation ($481,304) and investment growth ($318,864) that Dr. Kerwin earned over nearly a decade during his service as provost and interim president. He was required to take the payout when the funds vested, consistent with board policy. It is important to note that each year of the deferred compensation was previously reported on IRS 990 forms and prior surveys as a benefit.
I hope you are able to take a moment to review a communication from AU Board Chairman Gary M. Abramson, SPA/BA ’68, on this subject here.
On behalf of the AU Alumni Association Board, I would like to express my disappointment for the editorial choices utilized by the Chronicle and, subsequently, by other news outlets. During his tenure, Dr. Kerwin has led the university to tremendous financial and academic success and the board’s compensation is especially focused on competitive, market-based compensation that is not excessive. I am proud to be serving as Alumni Board President during this time. I hope that this information is helpful to you, and I encourage you to maintain an open and honest dialogue with your alma mater.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely,Brian F. Keane
Monday, October 26, 2009
X-treme townies
I can't see this happening at the Shoppe (where would you park it?), but this sure beats having a Dallas Cowgirls post at the top of the page:
Planet Moron, a kindred spirit if ever there was one, has more.
Man pleads guilty to DWI in motorized La-Z-Boy
A Minnesota man has pleaded guilty to driving his motorized La-Z-Boy chair while drunk. A criminal complaint says 62-year-old Dennis LeRoy Anderson told police he left a bar in the northern Minnesota town of Proctor on his chair after drinking eight or nine beers.
Planet Moron, a kindred spirit if ever there was one, has more.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Friday, October 23, 2009
Stop blogging now!
Or so says (sort of) friend of the Shoppe, Adam Keiper in his book review in the WSJ:
But what's so bad about a little self-censorship? It may prove safer for those of us who leave no moment unphotographed, no heartbreak or health scare unblogged, and no thought un-tweeted. And it may also help reawaken us to the quiet pleasures of private life.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
I was...
...going to post something about the pathetic, inept Washington Redskins, but even as a Cowboys fan, it's just not fun to dump on them anymore. What a sad state of affairs.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)