Malt Shop Logic

NBC News: Don't believe us!

2012-01-31T05:38:00.003-05:00

I'm amused by Tom Brokaw complaining about Mitt Romney's ad that features some footage from an NBC News broadcast about Gingrich's ethics censure (or whatever) from the House back in the 90s.

Politicians quote TV and newspapers all the time in their ads, and I've never heard a complaint, except on the occasional super out of context quote. But it's hard to see how 30 seconds or so could be that out of context.

You hear a lot of criticism of attack ads. This class of ad is probably the worst offender of out of context quotes. But this ad is pretty much just a rebroadcast of the nightly news. Conservatives have said for years that the mainstream media are biased against conservatives. So maybe this is just NBC copping to that bias.

But I suspect that's not what's happening, and that they just don't want to be associated with a political campaign. I could certainly understand why a journalist wouldn't want to sit down and shoot a campaign ad, but that's obviously not the case here.

Whatever their motivation, the message that they're putting out is that we shouldn't rely on NBC to provide us information for making decisions about voting. I'm just not sure how well this plan was thought through.

New Jersey

2012-01-24T10:35:00.001-05:00

This story reminded me of the joke when we were there.

Q. Where are the top three places where AU students come from?

A. New York, New Jersey and anywhere else outside the United States.

Weighing on my mind...

2012-01-09T11:57:00.002-05:00

In November, Cherie and I attended a Foo Fighters concert at Verizon Center here in DC. It was, hands-down, one of the top two shows I've ever attended -- and I've seen Pearl Jam 3 times, Nirvana, the Red Hot Chili Peppers, Jane's Addiction (with Dave Navarro), Live, the HFStival when it was in its heyday, Better then Ezra -- ok, that was a joke -- I really did see them -- at Bender Arena -- but it was not an inspiring show.

Dave Grohl and his fellow Foos, in a homecoming concert (Dave grew up in Springfield, not far from me, and attended the high school I would have attended had my family not moved to Japan halfway through 7th grade), rocked the house for 3 hours. The show was the Foo Fighters' first-ever sellout in the DC area. The crowd was full of energy. And, there was a special intensity to the band's playing -- you could just tell Dave was trying harder than normal throughout the show, whether it was sprinting from one end of the arena to the other, playing on a riser to the crowd in the back of the arena that rose about 30 feet above the ground, talking with the crowd about life growing up in northern Virginia, or playing with the crowd during the intermission between the main set and the encore -- it was just an awesome night.

But it got me thinking about that other show on my "top two" list, coincidentally also at the Verizon Center. On May 30, 2006, Pearl Jam played a show at the Phone Booth, backing its brand-new, self-titled album, also known as the "Avocado", after the picture of said fruit on the album's cover. It was the only indoor Pearl Jam concert I'd ever attended, and it was truly awesome. As I learned that night, the acoustics of an indoor arena are crucial for a band like Pearl Jam that relies so heavily on its interaction with the crowd. Being indoors allows the band and the crowd to hear each other's full-throated devotion, instead of having some of the volume, whether it's the crowd cheering or singing, or the guitar riff being ripped off by Mike McCready, drift away into the night air. The atmosphere that night was truly electric, with the band tearing through almost the whole new album, as well as classics I hadn't heard in forever (including their cover of the Dead Boys' "Sonic Reducer", one of my favorite "PJ songs" of all time, and a song they'd played regularly early in their career but sparingly in recent years), jumping around the stage, playing their hearts out, and the crowd routinely and lustily cheering and serenading the band.

It was also the only concert I've ever attended completely alone...and that made it even better. For the first time ever, I felt completely free to get there early, leave late, buy a t-shirt, sing at the top of my lungs, high-five my fellow concertgoers, rock out to the songs being sung, and generally immerse myself in the energy of the concert and the night. I drank in every moment, and I loved it. I left the show completely exhausted, and in a state of near-total bliss.

That spring, Cherie, pregnant with Audrey (5 months along, as Audrey was born almost 4 months to the day later) was already up in Connecticut, having had her job transferred from Tysons Corner to White Plains. I was still trying to get transferred to my employer's New York City office (which didn't happen until September of that year, days before Audrey's birth!), and working for Federal clients here in the DC area, then taking the Acela or my VW up to Connecticut every Friday night to spend the weekend with Cherie -- or working remotely from our house in Connecticut for extended periods if I could get away with it.

The concert was on a Tuesday night. I had bought tickets months before. Once she knew she was pregnant, Cherie was (understandably) wanting me to "work remotely" as often as I could so I could be with her in Connecticut. So, she was not really keen on the idea of me staying in DC for a concert, and had suggested at some point that I sell the tickets. I think part of her was also a bit jealous that I would be attending a PJ concert without her -- she loved them, too, and thought if she couldn't go, I shouldn't either. And, being pregnant, her hormones and emotions were jumping all over the place.

As it turned out, I was stuck in DC that week for client meetings I had to take in person -- so there was no chance for me to get up to Connecticut until the end of the week. And I had been so busy I'd forgotten about selling the tickets. And, to be fair, I'd never wanted to sell them in the first place, so perhaps my subconscious was acting up ....

In any case, finding them still in my possession that Tuesday night, I went. I told Cherie I had a dinner for work, so she wouldn't call me during the concert, or if she did, she would understand why I wouldn't pick up. And then I went and had (what was to date) the best concertgoing experience of my life.

In the years since, I've kept that experience a secret. I don't talk about it, for fear of slipping up in conversation with Cherie and referring to it. Several times, I've found it weighing on my mind. Cherie and I have a great relationship, but there are (as I think all men believe) certain things you just don't talk about with your spouse for fear of inciting an argument or hurt feelings, or both. This was one of those things (at the time) that I knew could not be discussed rationally without hurting Cherie's feelings, and making her angry at me, or both. And, I believe even today that if I revealed to her that I went to that concert, she would be angry with me. So, I didn't tell her about it then, and I don't talk about it now.

Except here on this blog where she will never read it (Amanda, don't you dare direct her here!).

I don't regret going -- it was a wonderful experience -- but what say you, fellow blog readers? Did I do the right thing in going? Did I do the understandable thing in not telling her? Should I just keep my mouth shut, or tell her now?

Smartest Guys in the Room

2011-12-16T13:42:00.002-05:00

This whole situation had to get stabilized, [Jeff] Skilling said. "What's this shit with Andy [Fastow], anyway?"

[Greg] Whalley pulled a face. "We're firing him."

Skilling was bowled over. "You've gotta be kidding," he said. "That's the dumbest thing. I mean, your CFO, you need to raise money, and you're firing him?"

"Hey, I don't know if he did anything wrong," Whalley said. "But that's beside the point."

Why? Skilling wanted to know.

"Jeff," Whalley said, "Andy was a really shitty CFO."

-Conspiracy of Fools: A True Story

Smartest Guys in the Room is one of my favorite documentaries in how it chronicles the illegal activity that helped bring Enron down. But Conspiracy of Fools is the authoritative book on the collapse and the story goes much deeper than the documentary. Turns out, not only was the CFO enriching himself at the expense of Enron, all these structures that he set up thinking they were enriching him and helping the company were so incompetently structured that they - not the illegal activity - really brought down the company.

Both the documentary and book are well worth your time. But my broader point is about what's really screwed the economy the last 10 years or so - it's that people are dumb. Or at least not as smart as they think they are.

Enron is a great example. The mortgage backed security debacle is another. Read The Big Short - there probably was some unethical marketing of the MBS bonds, but the bigger problem is that they were structured so incompetently that they were bound to fail. And most everyone assumed that the people putting them together were so smart that there couldn't be a problem. Of course, the folks who didn't take that on faith did just fine.

I've seen it in my own jobs - leaders are seen as "brilliant"/the smartest guy in the room and therefore never questioned, even if their ideas are basically stupid. Maybe they're not brilliant, just really smart and people (like the Board) should question harder what they're doing. Then again, maybe that's the problem - no one wants to ask the question that exposes themselves as not understanding the issue (and therefore not brilliant), even if that question will expose a bad idea.

Another anachronism

2011-12-05T12:54:00.001-05:00

I mentioned last week how anachronistic Semisonic's video for Closing Time was. On my ipod this morning? REM's song Star 69. Kids today probably have no idea what that song is referring to at all.

Closing Time

2011-11-30T16:47:00.002-05:00

Well, I can't believe this is still here - but thank goodness it is.

Don't know whether you read Grantland, but it's got some good stuff there. And today, it had an interesting article about why the song Closing Time from 1998 still resonates with people. I thought it was really well done.

But I decided to watch the music video that was embedded in the article and I couldn't help but think about this line from the article as I watched it:

"It was just a catchy, moderately rocking track by a journeyman Midwestern indie band that peaked in popularity as the alternative rock boom was hacking out its final, phlegm-y death rattle."

Watch the video - it's all about how the singer and his girlfriend can't connect/find each other. The girl even uses a pay phone. The whole scenario is wildly anachronistic - it's simply something that couldn't possibly happen today with iphones, instant messaging, facebook, etc. So, to some extent, that video depicts the death rattle not just of the alternative rock boom but of the 90s themselves - when you weren't hyperconnected and life was more complicated in some ways (finding people when you were out) but simpler at the same time.

Food for thought.

Casinos

2011-08-20T18:36:00.002-04:00

Posts like this remind me that a site like Malt Shop Logic probably couldn't exist in Australia. They should have just let the aborigines build casinos, like we did.

Some background if you've never heard of Andrew Bolt or white aborigines.

They're back...

2011-07-22T11:37:00.000-04:00

Click here for the goodness.

We were RIGHT!

2011-07-14T23:39:00.002-04:00

So it turns out North Dakota isn't a state, just like we told Byron Dorgan 18 years ago!

They're loud, they're mediocre...

2011-06-25T00:47:00.002-04:00

...and they should get the hell off the stage. I believe Beavis uttered these words nearly 20 years ago about Archers of Loaf...who are appearing on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon tonight. Why?

Big Blue is getting married...

2011-05-19T18:32:00.001-04:00

to Sal! Per his Facebook posting...

Sal Olivo
I'm very excited to announce that Rebecca and I have agreed to get married. I proposed in the balcony at the Uptown Theater, site of many great stories and films. Here's to our happy ending. Details on nuptials to come, but not now
Monday at 6:43am · Like ·

Joe, Call Your Office

2011-05-05T19:40:00.002-04:00

Indian police given moustache pay

Ten policemen in the northern state are already receiving 30 rupees (66 US cents) every month for their efforts.

Jhabua district police chief Mayank Jain told BBC News Online: "The response is growing and in the months ahead we expect to see more moustachioed policemen.

"Moustaches are improving the personalities of our constables. They are acquiring an aura of their own. They are creating a positive impression on the local people and getting a lot of respect."

But then, as we all know:

Mustache is a symbol of repression and of hate
Never trust a man with a butt broom on his face
It's the facial marking of the man who holds you down
The source of all your problems, every city, every town

So therefore...

Mr Jain said he was keeping a watch on the shape of the moustaches so that they did not look too intimidating, and so have the opposite effect on people.

Sh*t, that's nothing...

2011-05-02T00:50:00.002-04:00

...earlier today on the front 9 of Waelae in Hawaii I ran a streak that went:

Birdie
Birdie
Eagle
Par
Birdie

It earned my avatar on Tiger Woods PGA Tour 12 The Masters a slew of experience points

:-)

Back to Back

2011-04-29T22:48:00.002-04:00

If I weren't there I wouldn't believe it either. Played golf today and ended up with a 102, which is close to a personal best, with a 47 on the back 9, which probably is a personal best.

But the best part was the back to back birdies. Here's how it went:

Hole 13: Par 4, goes out about 100 yards, and then way down hill, slight dog leg left. Green has water on 3 sides. This is actually the #1 birdie hole on the course.

My drive sucked. 3 iron (my woods are way too wild, so they stay in the bag), hit reasonably hard, but pushed way right. I actually hit a net that protects a house, which was the only thing that kept me in bounds. However, I had a clear view to the green, and it was all down hill. Pitching wedge, about 3ft from the hole. Then I managed to actually make the putt, for a bird.

On to Hole 14. This drive sucked, too. 3 iron again, but hit fat, and just off the fairway to the left. This hill goes up a hill, and then back down, and a little up right at the green, so the approach is blind, although there are eucalyptus trees right behind the green, so you know where to aim.

In any case, on my second shot, I had about 225 to 210 yards to go. The green was probably slightly lower than where I was standing, but I'm not totally sure. Either way, I'd have to hit a 5 iron just right and get a good roll, or maybe some help from the wind to get to the green.

And all of that assumes that I hit the ball straight, which is far from a safe assumption. But I hit my 5 iron pretty hard, and the ball was going right at the big eucalyptus trees. We took the cart over the hill, and noticed a ball near the flag.

Turned out to be my ball, about 4 feet away. Another miracle, and I sunk the putt. This lead to multiple threats upon my body, about which I was much amused.

Of course, in a skins game, timing is everything, and these two holes gave me 9 skins. So I managed to win the game with a 102(!). The other players finished with 81, 87 and 97. Of course, this left me with the bar tab, but that's OK.

Happy Easter...

2011-04-24T09:00:00.001-04:00

Happy Easter, boys, to you and your families. I hope this message finds you all well, from Syracuse to Asheville to Los Angeles and all points between.

Now, it's not that time of year any more.

2011-04-18T10:06:00.000-04:00

Oh well.

That time of the year again

2011-03-15T18:07:00.001-04:00

Below I present you with my annual contribution to your ability to be competitive in your NCAA pools. This year, I have three metrics for you to evaluate the field and make your decisions.

A couple reminders. I’m not saying any of these metrics are perfect. Far from it. But they take the emotion out of picking winners (i.e., I won’t pick Illinois to do anything this year – not that I would. I’m sick of that team) so that you have the best chance of staying alive to win the pool. How will you win the pool? By picking the winner. That’s the only way. And overall the three metrics should paint a pretty clear picture of who the best teams are. Last year, Duke was at the top of all three of my metrics. That worked out pretty well.

Overview of the Metrics

Adjusted Scoring Margin (ASM) – Ah, the granddaddy of them all. I’ve been using this 2004 to help me in NCAA pools. It’s a tool that helps you evaluate who has played the best all year taking into account the level of competition.

Efficiency Margin-Conference Only (Major Conferences Only – ACC, Big East, Big 12, Big Ten, Pac-10, SEC) – I first came across this after the 2005 Tournament when the top four teams in this metric all made the Final Four. It hasn’t worked out that way since, but it’s been fairly predictive of at least the Elite Eight. Basically it measures the difference between how efficient you are on offense (points/possessions) and on defense (points against/possessions) just within your conference regular-season games. The higher the better. Why just major conferences? Because there are too many horrendous teams in non-major conferences that completely inflate the Efficiency Margin for the best teams in those lower conferences.

Efficiency Margin vs. Top 100 RPI – This is my own metric. So, it’s probably only so valid. But here’s my rationale. The teams you play in the tournament are almost definitely in the Top 100 RPI. So, why not find out how well the teams in the tournament do against that level of competition. I’m also able to include the best teams from the non-power conferences and level out the comparison by dropping their worst opponents. When I fooled around with this last year, the top two teams were Duke and Butler. Yeah, I know. I thought it was crap. I was wrong. But it’s worth a look anyway. It will probably never work out that way again.

Good luck.

Efficiency Margin vs. Top 100 RPI

2011-03-15T17:52:00.000-04:00

I didn’t do this for the whole field, but I feel fairly confident that the winner of the tournament will come from this group.

The top teams listed will be a recurring theme in all the metrics, but let me point a couple things out:
· Ohio State and Kansas have been good against top teams all year. Really good.
· This won’t be the last time I say this: Washington, despite all it’s ups and downs this year, is not an unreasonable pick to beat North Carolina.
· The BYU figure can’t account for the loss of its top rebounder. So, I probably won’t be picking them to go to the Final Four based on this metric. They will probably win the whole thing now.
· Check out Notre Dame. When they looked like they were heading for a #1 seed, I was ecstatic. I was going to pick against them as much as I could. I believe they are a fraud. This does not dissuade me.

Region
Seed
Team
Top100 RPI EM

East 1 Ohio State 17.32
East 8 George Mason 12.07
East 7 Washington 7.30
East 6 Xavier 5.87
East 2 North Carolina 5.86
East 3 Syracuse 5.84
East 4 Kentucky 5.20
East 9 Villanova 2.73
East 5 West Virginia 2.00
East 11 Marquette 0.08
East 10 Georgia -2.70

Southeast 3 BYU 10.94
Southeast 1 Pittsburgh 10.72
Southeast 2 Florida 9.55
Southeast 4 Wisconsin 8.24
Southeast 9 Old Dominion 2.27
Southeast 6 St. John's 0.96
Southeast 8 Butler 0.78
Southeast 11 Gonzaga 0.62
Southeast 5 Kansas State 0.60
Southeast 7 UCLA 0.38
Southeast 10 Michigan State -5.92
Southeast 12 Utah State -6.52

Southwest 1 Kansas 15.71
Southwest 3 Purdue 10.58
Southwest 5 Vanderbilt 3.79
Southwest 2 Notre Dame 3.68
Southwest 4 Louisville 3.59
Southwest 9 Illinois 2.36
Southwest 6 Georgetown 0.72
Southwest 12 Richmond 0.41
Southwest 8 UNLV -2.50
Southwest 10 Florida State -6.06

West 1 Duke 10.72
West 2 San Diego State 9.28
West 4 Texas 8.75
West 6 Cincinatti 6.07
West 9 Tennessee 2.30
West 3 Connecticut 2.21
West 7 Temple 1.20
West 11 Missouri 0.84
West 8 Michigan -3.30
West 5 Arizona -4.68

Efficiency Margin - Conference Only (Major Conference Only)

2011-03-15T17:44:00.002-04:00

As explained earlier, here’s the efficiency margin for major conference teams, conference games only. Hey, look who has the best efficiency margin!
· Again, Washington over North Carolina is not far-fetched.
· Notre Dame does not stack up against Purdue – again.
· If you want to take a flyer on something, try Texas over Duke. One, Texas hit a lull but they were being talked about as a #1 seed not that long ago so they’re not 4-seed quality. Two, from what I’ve seen, they’re exactly the kind of team that gives Duke trouble – good defensive team, tall, athletic (think Florida State).

Region Seed Team EM
East 1 Ohio State 16.66
East 4 Kentucky 11.68
East 7 Washington 11.12
East 2 North Carolina 11.03
East 3 Syracuse 8.76
East 12 Clemson 6.06
East 5 West Virginia 5.11
East 10 Georgia 5.07
East 11 Marquette 3.68
East 9 Villanova 1.46

Southeast 1 Pittsburgh 14.79
Southeast 2 Florida 11.85
Southeast 4 Wisconsin 9.72
Southeast 7 UCLA 6.01
Southeast 5 Kansas State 4.58
Southeast 6 St. John's 1.94
Southeast 10 Michigan State -3.85

Southwest 1 Kansas 17.26
Southwest 3 Purdue 12.60
Southwest 2 Notre Dame 7.58
Southwest 4 Louisville 6.77
Southwest 9 Illinois 4.67
Southwest 5 Vanderbilt 4.57
Southwest 10 Florida State 4.35
Southwest 11 USC 3.24
Southwest 6 Georgetown -0.53

West 4 Texas 19.79
West 1 Duke 15.72
West 5 Arizona 5.73
West 6 Cincinatti 5.04
West 11 Missouri 4.54
West 9 Tennessee 3.45
West 3 Connecticut 0.76
West 10 Penn State -1.72
West 8 Michigan -3.17

ASM - East Region

2011-03-15T17:41:00.001-04:00

ASM – East Region

Here’s the thing. I know everyone says that this is the toughest region and it’s become fashionable to pick someone other than Ohio State. But…OSU has lost two games all year on the road versus two really good teams. Otherwise, they’ve pretty much dominated. I think Kentucky is the only legitimate threat here. North Carolina has ended the season on a hot streak as in a winning streak but they miraculously won three or four of their last games. They’re not dominating. Syracuse just doesn’t measure up either. I’m picking Ohio State in all my pools.

Seed Team ASM
1 Ohio State 20.0
4 Kentucky 16.2
7 Washington 14.9
2 North Carolina 14.3
3 Syracuse 13.3
8 George Mason 11.7
5 West Virginia 10.5
9 Villanova 10.1
11 Marquette 9.9
6 Xavier 9.7
12 Clemson 9.5
12 UAB 8.0
10 Georgia 7.2
15 LIU-Brooklyn 6.2
13 Princeton 4.6
14 Indiana State 2.4

ASM Southwest Region

2011-03-15T17:39:00.001-04:00

ASM – Southwest Region

Um, Kansas. I do not like Notre Dame here. Purdue can make the Elite Eight, but I don’t think they can beat Kansas. That said, Kansas under Bill Self is extreme feast or famine. Buyer beware.

Seed Team ASM
1 Kansas 20.4
3 Purdue 14.3
4 Louisville 14.2
2 Notre Dame 13.4
5 Vanderbilt 12.2
8 UNLV 11.8
9 Illinois 10.4
6 Georgetown 10.2
7 Texas A&M 10.0
12 Richmond 9.1
10 Florida State 8.9
11 USC 7.2
13 Morehead State 5.9
11 Virginia Commonwealth 5.2
15 Akron 2.7
14 St. Peter's College 1.9

ASM West Region

2011-03-15T17:37:00.001-04:00

I’d say Duke is a good pick here. If you’re going to do two brackets, I say pick Texas in another one. San Diego State has had a nice year, but I don’t think they stack up. Connecticut had a good run in the Big East tournament, but there was a reason they had to win five games in five nights – they were the #9 seed there. Eventually things revert to the mean

Seed Team ASM
1Duke 19.8
4 Texas 16.9
2 San Diego State 14.5
3 Connecticut 11.5
5 Arizona 11.4
11 Missouri 11.3
6 Cincinnati 10.7
7 Temple 9.6
9 Tennessee 8.4
13 Oakland 8.4
8 Michigan 7.0
10 Penn State 6.4
14 Bucknell 5.9
12 Memphis 5.6
15 Northern Colorado 3.1

ASM - Southeast Region

2011-03-15T17:34:00.002-04:00

Interesting fact that only I would be aware of. The team with the lowest ASM of the region leaders (so the lowest ASM out of Ohio State, Kansas, Duke and Pittsburgh), has never made the Final Four in the years I’ve been following this metric. Doesn’t mean the other three teams made it, but the fourth best team hasn’t. So, if you don’t think four #1 seeds are going to make the Final Four, you might want to try Florida or BYU if you’re really feeling frisky. That said, this region stinks so Pittsburgh will probably go to the Final Four. Belmont and Utah State’s ASM’s are inflated, but might be worth an upset pick in the first round.

Seed-Team-ASM
1 Pittsburgh - 16.0
3 BYU - 15.7
13 Belmont - 15.1
12 Utah State - 13.3
2 Florida - 13.1
4 Wisconsin - 13.0
11 Gonzaga - 11.3
5 Kansas State - 11.2
8 Butler - 8.6
9 Old Dominion - 8.2
6 St. John's - 7.8
7 UCLA - 7.0
10 Michigan State - 6.8
14 Wofford - 4.9
15 UCSB - 2.0

Your NCAA bracket metrics are coming

2011-03-14T14:15:00.001-04:00

Probably will post tonight with analysis. Maybe tomorrow. If you need this information sooner because your pool gives points for the first four games, you are in a bad pool.

Thanks for the advice

2011-02-16T17:14:00.004-05:00

Some of the best advice I ever received during college came from Paul Williams*. He was very clear: go to Camillos on Monday for a haircut because Camillo isn't there. He was right. Camillo, while nice, didn't give good haircuts, mostly because he was always distracted. Unfortunately, there wasn't a day where both Camillo and Dante were gone, so you had to take your chances.

I was reminded of this yesterday as I ventured to a new barbershop. I have a good one near where I live, but my long weekday commute and extensive weekend obligations have made it difficult to fit in a haircut. So I made an appointment at Carmie's, which is an original tenant of the Standard Oil building/Aon Center where I work. But I got some advice: don't make an appointment with Carmie. Not only are his haircuts subpar, but his conversation is "pornographic" at times.

That's the kind of advice we all need.

*He also gave me the worst advice: "this King Cobra is pretty good. You should try it."

Are you threatening me??

2011-02-03T00:16:00.000-05:00

Oh yes, they're coming back.......

I suspect Chapin

2011-01-27T12:52:00.001-05:00

Headline: Fish poisoned during burglary

I think we should

2011-01-26T12:27:00.003-05:00

AU President Cornelius Kerwin sent me - ME! - an email last night asking for my thoughts on AU's 2011 Campus Plan draft. It's actually quite interesting and even bold in some parts. Just wanted to make sure you saw it. I might add some comments later on what I think of it.

The Tavern is no more...

2011-01-11T17:42:00.002-05:00

I took my family to see the AU Eagles men's basketball team take on the Lehigh University Hawks this past weekend. AU won, 82-75. Curiously, a team that has long relied on sharp outside shooting instead turned to the inside play of Vlad Moldoveanu and Stephen Lumpkin to get by the Hawks. Vlad had something like 37 points, far outpacing any other player on the floor. Lumpkin was also a significant presence, though his stone-handed ballhandling skills limited his effectiveness. My conclusion is that the Eagles with a dominant Moldoveanu can win the Patriot League -- but that the Eagles without Vlad would struggle to score 50 points/game consistently.

Anyway...Cherie and I decided we'd go early to the game, take the kids to the Campus Store for some AU youth gear, then take them to the Tavern for lunch. So, we hopped in the car, hit campus, bought some stuff at the Campus Store, walked into the Tavern, and...

...the Tavern is no more.

Sure, it's there in name. There's a sign on the wall in the old space that reads, "The Tavern".

But the booths? Gone. The pictures of AU athletics "glory" past? Gone. The TVs? Gone. The distinctive bar? Gone. In their place, gray-white walls, cool red and blue light panels that reach nearly from floor to ceiling, recessed lighting, and some very metro stackable chairs and tables. The character that once gave the Tavern a somewhat Tavern-like atmosphere cannot be found in the Anti-Tavern.

And you say you want to instill spirit by hosting gatherings of students or alums before or after a men's basketball game, or say, any other athletic/spirit event? Sorry, the Anti-Tavern is not open on Saturdays for food service.

You say you want to enjoy a soda or beer and converse with friends or family at a table before or after the big game? Sorry, the bar is closed and the tables and chairs are stacked and not available for use.

I find it very odd that that a university that wants to increase alumni attendance at and participation in athletic and other events has cut off a significant part of the atmosphere that favors the necessary enthusiasm. I am sad for the athletes who no longer have a place outside of Bender that tells them that AU is proud of the athletic heritage of the university or of their place in the current program. And, I am sad that alums (many of them with families) no longer have a convenient on-campus gathering place prior to or after games; it plays such a significant role in the "fan experience" to have a place to bring your kids, grab a bite to eat, relax before or after the game (especially after, to let the traffic clear out of the Bender garage).

I am glad we attended AU when the Tavern was truly a tavern, and when it was part of a vital experience at AU.

PS...Can I just say...

2010-12-02T00:18:00.001-05:00

...that I HATE that some idiot activists decided a few years ago that my birthday would be World AIDS Day? How fucking depressing. That is all.

My daughter looks like a Conehead/Head Trauma survivor......

2010-12-02T00:12:00.002-05:00

I can't write this on Facebook, so I'll do it here:

My daughter looks like a Conehead. Or a Head Trauma survivor. Or a mix of both.

A couple of weeks ago, she suffered a series of violent and unexplained convulsions while sleeping. The convulsions went on every 30 seconds for about 6 hours between 9 pm and 3 am. She's been to the hospital and to see a neurologist. Since the first episode, she's suffered only maybe 1-2 more episodes -- much less violent, much shorter in duration. The neurologist wants to get some data on her brain waves...so...

Today, Cherie took her to have a portable EEG strapped to her body. As part of the process, they piled all the hair on top of her head and placed electrode leads all over her scalp, then wrapped it all in white gauze. When I walked in the door from work, I was immediately struck by her appearance. I had to stop myself from blurting out to Cherie, "What the hell is this? She looks like a Conehead!"

I took some pics, which I may or may not publish here.

Rosco P. Coltrane

2010-11-17T19:05:00.004-05:00

In learning phonemes, my son has taken to squealing, "Coo-coo-coooo!"

It sounds uncannily like two things: Rosco P. Coltrane on most every episode of The Dukes of Hazzard, and Chris Close while sneaking trash from 4319 44th St to every other trash can in Tenleytown throughout our final night.

I find myself snickering every time I hear it.

Uh huh huh huh huh...she said stroke...

2010-11-14T17:05:00.001-05:00

In honor of a certain show we used to watch.

AU Women's Field Hockey loses in the NCAA tourney to #5 UCONN in a sudden death "stroke off".

Oh, the comedic possibilities are endless....

November 2

2010-10-28T10:12:00.002-04:00

I don't think I've been more excited about an election day since 1994.

Of course, I didn't know how good that day would be. So, I may have been more excited about the King Cobra that Paul kept stocked at his house and would share with us lowly, uh, non-21 year olds.

Really, 16 years later, tough to say.

Hey, Cancer. F You.

2010-10-27T22:30:00.002-04:00

Fresh off skin cancer surgery, my father will have surgery to remove a cancerous prostate on the Monday before Thanksgiving. If everything goes as planned, he'll be home from the hospital on the day before Thanksgiving.

Needless to say, on top of Cherie's father passing away in March from prostate cancer, this news hasn't exactly made for happy days in the Chapin-Raven household.

So, yeah, Cancer? Fuck you and the horse you rode in on.

Catching Up

2010-10-26T17:03:00.002-04:00

The World, with the Shoppe, that is...

Anne Applebaum...

Whatever connotations it once had, the word "moderate" has now come to mean "liberal" or even "left-wing" in American politics.

No. Two weeks ago, Chris Close and I...

2010-10-15T16:25:00.001-04:00

...brought back the clinic. Over golden tee. and almost made a stranger cry. Actually he may actually have cried but we wouldn't have noticed. It was diesel.

Discuss.

Death of the Malt Shop Logic blog?

2010-09-24T21:31:00.001-04:00

Ok, I'm tired of seeing my post at the top of this page. Has this blog died, thanks to Facebook and the increasing responsibilities of adulthood/parenthood?

My cousin, the murderer...

2010-08-30T15:53:00.004-04:00

My family, on both the paternal and maternal side, has been remarkably stable and happy. Each side gets along well internally, and the two sides are actual very friendly with each other, which has always made it enjoyable to attend family events, especially those that involve attendees from both sides. Additionally, in my entire extended family, there have been no criminals, no "ne'er do wells", etc. And, there has been only one divorce -- and that was precipitated by the trauma surrounding the sudden and unexpected death of a teen-aged son.

Then, there's my cousin, Jonathan -- son of my Aunt Joanne, and, well, a murderer.

In May 2002, my cousin failed to deplane a flight from Connecticut's Bradley Airport to BWI, where a professor from the University of Maryland was awaiting his arrival. Jonathan was being flown in to be interviewed for a professorship. He had been a gifted veterinarian for several years and was being considered for a position in Maryland's Department of Veterinary Medicine.

Several calls revealed that Jonathan had missed his flight because the night before he was supposed to fly in for the interview, he had shot and killed his ex-girlfriend, and was now jailed.

While under the treatment of a psychiatrist for depression stemming from the breakup of the relationship with his long-time girlfriend, Jonathan had been prescribed two medications by that psychiatrist. It just so happened that those two particular medications were contraindicated -- meaning that the drugmakers for each had given very clear instructions that under no circumstances should they have been prescribed in tandem. Why, you ask? Well, doctors and drugmakers had observed that patients taking both drugs in combination sometimes experienced homicidal feelings.

Not long after beginning the prescribed pharmaceutical regimen, Jonathan experienced just what had been previously observed. Under the influence of both drugs, and upset by an interaction with his ex-girlfriend, he committed a terrible series of acts. He drove to his parents' home while they were at work, unlocked his father's gun cabinet, removed a pistol and ammunition, loaded the weapon, drove to his ex's parents' home -- where she lived -- found a hiding place in her parents' bedroom, and awaited her return from work.

She arrived home with her younger sister and bounded upstairs. He emerged from his hiding place, confronted her about the demise of their relationship, then pointed the pistol at her and shot her until the gun's clip emptied. Within moments, the poor, 24 year-old girl was dead from wounds to the chest, face, head, and arm.

Not realizing his gun was empty, Jonathan walked downstairs, pointed the gun at his ex's sister, and fired. Thankfully, the gun clicked on an empty chamber. Finally realizing he was out of bullets, Jonathan exited the house and ran. Not long after, the police spotted him. Seeing them, he stopped, said he had just killed his girlfriend, pointed out where he had dropped a blue, plastic bag containing the gun, and submitted to arrest.

Over the course of a year, with a lot of back and forth over his culpability vs. the role of the drugs he'd been prescribed and his physician's incompetence (he apparently had stated his homicidal feelings to the psychiatrist, who failed to report them to the authorities), the state eventually offered Jonathan a plea deal with a 42-year prison sentence attached. He accepted the sentence, which included a no-parole provision required by Connecticut state law. Provided he lives long enough, he'll leave prison at the age of 72.

Until her death yesterday, my Aunt Joanne remained steadfast in support of her son, believing him to be twisted by the drugs into a state he never would have entered unless under their influence. She appealed his conviction, seeking a new trial (the original trial had suffered a number of potentially injurious failings, including incompetent representation and the fact that the judge in the case had been a friend of the victim's family and had refused to recuse herself), and sought a new location for his sentence (the state refused to place him in a facility where he could receive treatment for depression and other mental issues, even after he tried to kill himself while awaiting sentencing). She visited him in prison often, and never wavered from being his biggest champion. Now she is gone, and with her likely goes any hope Jonathan had for a future without bars.

Those of us who were less close to Jonathan have always had difficulty with the "the drugs did it" defense. His particular series of acts seemed terribly deliberate -- to require planning, forethought, cunning, and execution that most of us consider outside the abilities of a thoroughly drug-addled brain. We thought he must have known what he was doing, and that it was wrong. Though we've been asked to visit Jonathan, to write him letters, to appear as character references, we've just never been able to bring ourselves to support him. He sits in a cell, his talents wasted, his ex-girlfriend's life brutally and unforgivably ended, her sister forever traumatized by the horror of the night her sister died, her parents bereft of a daughter about whose future they will always wonder, his parents bereft of the son they thought of as sweet and innocent, all of us who called him "family" somewhat touched by the knowledge that we shared many holiday and other family events with a boy, then a man, capable of one of humanity's most base and awful acts.

The hits just keep on coming...

2010-08-30T15:44:00.004-04:00

My aunt Joanne, who I wrote about in my last post, died yesterday. She was having surgery to address some cancer-related issues and suffered cardiac arrest while on the operating table. Apparently, when they opened her up, they discovered that the cancer was raging much, much worse than they'd thought previously. She'd have been gone within weeks or months if not for the sudden arrest.

Joanne suffered some truly bad beats during the last decade of her life, but I'll be damned if I ever saw her without a smile on her face (more on one of those bad beats in the next post). She was incredibly sweet to Cherie, the kids, an me, and I'll always be grateful for her kindness and generosity. Selfishly, I also wouldn't mind if next year we didn't suffer 3 cancer-related deaths in the family within 7 months. It's a little tough to take.

Cancer rules everything around me...

2010-08-15T00:42:00.003-04:00

Until recently, if you'd asked me whether cancer ran in my family, or whether I gave it much thought, I'd say no. Heart disease from generations eating too much kielbasa and other fatty delicacies? Yup. Diabetes in the genes, and from slow metabolism, indulgent eating habits, and not enough exercise? Yes, we've got that, too.

But I always felt blessed that the diseases that spanned generations within my family were "lifestyle" diseases -- and that accumulation of the right habits might help me avoid them altogether.

But lately, it seems that we, either directly or through relationships, cannot escape the presence and action of cancer. My uncle Jack died of pancreatic cancer a few years ago. His wife, my aunt Ruth, succumbed to pancreatic cancer in February. Cherie's dad succumbed to prostate cancer in March. My aunt Joanne is suffering from pancreatic cancer and is probably less than a year out (and maybe much sooner) from falling to it. While on vacation this week, I found out that my father will, on the day after his 63rd birthday, have his second surgery in 3 years to remove a spot of skin cancer on his face.

And, since I had those hiccups earlier this year (which have begun a comeback the last few days), I've been diagnosed with an esophageal ulcer, which now puts me at greater risk for developing esophageal cancer.

At work, a colleague and friend who was originally diagnosed with prostate cancer was recently told that he'd been misdiagnosed and is actually suffering from pancreatic cancer. It's now attached itself to his colon, kidneys, and bladder, and (as he told me while breaking down emotionally during lunch a few weeks ago), has been deemed "terminal" by his new team of doctors.

Even on TV, I can't escape it. One of my favorite TV personalities has long been the author, intellectual, and professional critic, Christopher Hitchens. The rakish, acerbic, professional arguer, most often found clutching a whiskey in hand while articulating a strong and often contrarian position about an issue of the day, his long hair flowing with the rhythm of his argument, was recently diagnosed with and treated for esophageal cancer. Last night, I caught an interview with him conducted by Charlie Rose, and I was stunned by what I saw. The flowing locks are gone entirely, replaced by chemo-induced baldness, save for a few pathetic wisps of hair. The fire in his eyes has been dulled, and the color in his cheeks replaced by sallowness and sagging. I felt, watching him, as though I was staring at his animated death mask rather than at his living face. It was truly awful -- perhaps because a part of me thought I might be staring at a future version of myself.

Son of Teddy Senate Coke Probe

2010-08-13T21:36:00.002-04:00

Albino python on cocaine confronts police

Police raiding a drug den in the Italian capital have been confronted by an aggressive albino python which was used to intimidate addicts.

No handicapped Cubans could be reached for comment.

(h/t AoSHQ)

The 10 Kinds Of Cleavage

2010-07-25T18:12:00.003-04:00

I suspect this passes the hurdle of "interesting" in these parts. Choice quote:

If it bends, I can screw it.

h/t Little Miss Attilla via The Other McCain

Follow me on twitter, bitches

2010-07-09T10:47:00.001-04:00

/matthewrsnyder

I hate...

2010-06-25T15:53:00.003-04:00

...stupid, incompetent, shiftless people who refuse to do their jobs, but then when they must play a role at the end of a months-long process, take great delight in throwing up every roadblock of which they can conceive.

I hate them. And I wish they would all suddenly drop dead of an aneurysm.

That is all.

Five Words...

2010-06-10T14:54:00.001-04:00

From last night's Dave Ellis concert:

Sal and Big Blue. Dating.

Wow.

Way to go, New Jersey...

2010-06-04T12:56:00.001-04:00

...poisoning our children with heavy metal carcinogens since, well, ever....

The Tavern

2010-06-03T11:29:00.001-04:00

Memory failing...were people allowed to smoke in the Tavern while we were in school? I know they were allowed to smoke outside the McKinley Building, but I can't remember if people were allowed to smoke inside anywhere.

For those of you...

2010-05-26T20:12:00.002-04:00

...who might be Glenn Beck aficionados, and think he might be scrawling the truth across his blackboard, consider this. In Forbes magazine, in a cover revealing the extent of his ever-growing media empire, Beck revealed his true self, saying, and I quote, "I don't give a flying crap about the political process. We're an entertainment company." Beck has discovered the obvious truth that appealing to the worst instincts in other human being is lucrative to the tune of a $32M bucket of cash...........

Today, on Craigslist ...

2010-05-14T10:22:00.003-04:00

So I'm trying to buy a used boat trailer. And I posted same on Syracuse Craigslist.

And the Captcha anti-spam verification phrase it asked me to type in was,

"employed hebrews"

Congratulations anyway, Joe.

How about...

2010-05-12T22:01:00.001-04:00

...those Les Habitants!! Go Montreal. F Pittsburgh.

Chapin out.

Published!

2010-04-29T23:36:00.003-04:00

Once upon a time, I was a lot of things, including creative. Somewhere along the way to becoming an adult, I forgot or suppressed (or both) that part of me.

Recently, I decided to pick up my pen and start exercising my brain again. Among other things, I submitted a short piece of prose to a semi-professional "litblog". Tonight, I found out that piece will be published in June.

I must admit, I'm a little bit tickled!

URL to follow in June.

Epic Windows Phone Failure...

2010-04-28T23:30:00.003-04:00

For the last several months, I've been using the employer-issued (Sprint) HTC Touch Pro 2 "smartphone". Mostly, I've enjoyed it. Oh sure, the HTC "Touch Flo 3d" touchscreen software is a bit quirky, and it's a Windows phone, which means it has had its share of random system crashes; and sometimes the phone has slipped into "Airplane" mode (no active phone/data connections) all by itself, leaving me to miss several hours of phone calls without knowing it -- but the screen is large, the phone is durable (it has endured a few drops here and there), it has a nice slide-out keyboard, and it has performed various business functions without much incident.

Until yesterday.

Yesterday, the phone, while sitting on my desk, suddenly crapped itself. I got a series of "We're sorry" notifications from Windows as several executables stopped working -- cprog.exe, services.exe, device.exe, opera9.exe all stopped working in succession. Then, ActiveSync stopped working (last sync at 10:03 a.m. yesterday; none since). Then the phone became incredibly sluggish, often taking over a minute (and sometimes several minutes) to respond to the pressing of physical and virtual buttons. Then, I could no longer initiate phone calls -- I could only receive them.

I tried a succession of potential fixes -- I powered down; I tried a soft reset; I tried removing the battery. I left it off for several hours, then powered it back on, only to be told that the phone had tried and failed to complete the "Hands Free Activation" -- this on a phone I'd activated with Sprint several months ago.

So, a replacement phone is on the way. Sprint's policy is to reissue a new phone of the same make and model. I probably could have traded up to the newest, latest, greatest phone, but I just wasn't in the mood to push the poor customer service guy, who was otherwise quite helpful and friendly to boot..

So, here's hoping this one doesn't melt down!

Showing My Ignorance

2010-04-23T15:25:00.002-04:00

Did you know that John Riggins was known as "The Diesel"? And that he'll be the 2010 Sports Marshal at my town's annual Apple Blossom Festival starting up tonight?

It brings me to one question: do you think he'll enjoy a Bud Diesel while in town? Or will he just long for the old bar he used to call home?

Ladner probably left them behind...

2010-04-17T17:49:00.002-04:00

Looks like more chemical weapons have been found near AU:

The home where the latest munitions were uncovered is federal property. Next door is the university president's home, and the South Korean ambassador lives on the other side.

Cured...

2010-04-13T00:26:00.002-04:00

Tuesday night: multi-hr ER stay culminating in receipt of 30 mg of intravenous Thorazine. Hiccups and muscular spasms went away at peak dose, came back as the dose came down -- though not as intense.

Wednesday night: spasms were back, strong enough I considered returning to the hospital. Ultimately, I passed out about 2:30 Thursday morning without going back.

Thursday: woke up a little after 8, had one minor hiccup...all day.

Friday: No spasms/hiccups. Endoscopy revealed only irritation of the esophagus and stomach. Possible a "sliding hiatal hernia" had occurred, in which the upper end of the stomach had squeezed itself into the esophagus for a few days, only to "slide" back into place prior to the procedure.

Saturday/Sunday/Monday: No spasms/hiccups.

Apparently I'm cured. Still feeling run-down after 2 weeks of hiccups and spasms every day combined with reflux and other nasty effects. But damn, it's nice to breathe easy and keep down a meal.

Fuck Congress with a Stick

2010-04-09T17:18:00.003-04:00

That is all.

Actually, that's not all... first time checking in in a while.

Chapin, sorry for your family's loss. Tell Cherie I said, "keep your head up"

In brighter news, I know an assload about fishing on the salmon river. The stories are true if you go with the right guide at the right time of year. It can also be really, really good on the nearshore of Ontario and I'm a good friend with one of the, or maybe THE, best guide in that business.

Hit my gmail and I'll send you some ideas.

--M

F'ing hiccups...

2010-04-07T19:55:00.001-04:00

10 days in, and hiccups still won't go away. Last night I ended up in the ER loaded up with Thorazine via IV because the hiccups have turned into powerful spasms that shut down my airway and leave me unable to breathe for several seconds at a time.

I have an endoscopy on Friday so the docs can view my insides (and hopefully figure out why I'm spasming, and then fix the damn problem).

If only I had the courage of my convictions

2010-04-05T22:11:00.001-04:00

Take a look at this recreation of my post from March about adjusted efficiency margin. Look at two of the top three teams. To make me feel better, let's ignore the fact that Gonzaga was in Butler's bracket too.

1. Duke - 20.89 - Championship
Gonzaga - 20.88 – uh, just ignore for the purposes of this post
2. Butler - 18.61 - Championship
3. Kansas - 14.52 – Rd. 32
4. Kentucky - 10.94 – Elite 8
Syracuse - 9.99 – defeated by Butler (see above) so doesn’t count against elite 8 count
UTEP - 9.90 – defeated by Butler (see above) so doesn’t count against elite 8 count
5. California - 9.57 – Rd 32
6. West Virginia - 7.53 – Final Four
7. Ohio State - 7.17 – Sweet 16
8. Baylor - 6.66 – Elite 8

I Dunno, Chappy...

2010-04-05T19:53:00.003-04:00

The "last" resort for your hiccup problem might work out ok for you...

www.youtube.com/watch?v=AZ93JG4xiwQ#t=02m27s

Stay away from my poop chute....

2010-04-04T21:16:00.003-04:00

Last Sunday, I started hiccuping, and one week later, I haven't stopped hiccuping. And boy howdy, it sucks.

I'd gotten hiccups before, even had them last a few hours. But nothing prepares one for the prospect of hiccups that continue hour after hour, day after day, for a week straight.

I've tried all of the traditional remedies, and none of them have worked. I've been to the doctor, been put on one drug, but it hasn't worked. I will go back in the morning to ask for the next step in the treatment process, and if it doesn't include something that treats pain, I will ask for that, too. Imagine your diaphragm spasming every 5-10 seconds for 7 straight days, and then imagine that your gastrointestinal system has gotten in the act because it is upset by the constant spasming. So for the last two days, the hiccups have been followed by vomiting. Can't eat, can't breathe (well), can't talk, exhausted and can't play with the kids or help Cherie with them.

Oh, and get this: one of the newer treatments for intractable hiccups? Digital Rectal Massage.

Yeah, it is what you think it is. I'll be asking for that as one of the LAST options.......

"Everything I cook tastes better than yo' momma's nipples."

2010-03-14T22:04:00.002-04:00

I'd somewhat randomly googled the name of a fictional restaurant, from one of my favorite authors, and the linked post came up near the top. Somehow, the Coolio references seem to make that relevant to the Shoppe, plus, if we're lucky, the title may start a bit of an effort to make inane statements appear to be from Josh. The comments are pretty good, and will at least take your mind off of college basketball, if that's the sort of thing you're not into:

"This is much better than Snoop Dogg's cookbook. Grizzle Chickizzle with Aspargizzle gets tiresome after a while."

posted by dr_dank

For Starters

2010-03-14T21:00:00.002-04:00

Let me apologize to readers of Cheshire's Google Buzz - I've flooded it, but really had no choice. Blame Google.

Next, let's have a fun Q&A:

Q. How many Final Fours will Kentucy go to under John Calipari?
A. None officially. They'll all be vacated due to rules violations that are discovered after Calipari leaves the school (see: UMass, Memphis).

Hey-o! That was for you, Renkey.

Anyway, below are my statistical guideposts for your NCAA bracket picking this year. ASM has been pretty good. So has efficiency margin. Take your pick.

IMO, Kentucky has a ridiculous path to the Final Four. I say they don't make it. Syracuse, for all the complaining they did on the selection show about their being sent out west, got a pretty easy path. Like Duke-Baylor in elite 8. Kansas has a challenging bracket, but they are the best team - and will win the title.

But I've been wrong before.

Conference-only Efficiency Margin

2010-03-14T20:53:00.003-04:00

Here's your conference-only efficiency margin. Generally predictive of the elite 8, especially when you discount the non-power conference teams on this list. Of course, it doesn't really match up with the ASM, so who knows.

BYU - 21.70
Butler - 20.63
Kansas - 18.00
Xavier - 17.70
Gonzaga - 17.67
Duke - 17.56
Wisconsin - 16.62
Temple - 15.21
UNLV - 14.41
Kentucky - 14.21
UTEP - 13.76
St. Mary's - 13.60
Ohio State - 12.64
California - 12.42
Richmond - 11.87
Syracuse - 11.65
West Virginia - 11.62
Maryland - 10.77
New Mexico - 10.45
Purdue - 10.10
Baylor - 9.70
Villanova - 8.35
Kansas State - 8.29
Michigan State - 7.93
Marquette - 7.73
Pitt - 6.52
Missouri - 5.38
Georgetown - 5.34
Vanderbilt - 5.31
Texas A&M - 4.81

Adjusted Efficiency Margin

2010-03-14T20:43:00.002-04:00

I tried to normalize things by only measuring efficiency margin in conference games for top 100 RPI teams. The good thing is that it eliminates a lot of games by non-power conference teams against the dregs of society and shows you how these teams did against the type of team in the tourney. The bad thing is that it leaves a few teams with a small sample (Gonzaga, Butler, St. Mary's, to name the obvious). I tested this on last year's field and it gets you 6-7 out of 8 elite 8 teams so maybe it's worthwhile. If you don't believe a mid-major is going to make it to the elite 8, just disregard them from the list.

Duke - 20.89
Gonzaga - 20.88
Butler - 18.61
Kansas - 14.52
Kentucky - 10.94
Syracuse - 9.99
UTEP - 9.90
California - 9.57
West Virginia - 7.53
Ohio State - 7.17
Baylor - 6.66
Richmond - 6.53
Purdue - 6.19
Kansas State - 5.36
Villanova - 4.15
Temple - 4.03
Wisconsin - 3.83
Maryland - 3.35
Pitt - 3.23
Vanderbilt - 2.94

East Region ASM

2010-03-14T20:36:00.001-04:00

Here's the East Region as the ASM sees it:

Kentucky (1) - 16.7
Wisconsin (4) - 14.8
Missouri (10) - 14.3
Texas (8) - 14.2
West Virginia (2) - 13.6
Clemson (7) - 13.0
Washington (11) - 11.9
Marquette (6) - 11.1
New Mexico (3) - 10.9
Temple (5) - 10.5
Cornell (12) - 9.2
Wake Forest (9) - 8.2
Montana (14) - 5.8
Wofford (13) - 5.2
Morgan State (15) - 4.3

Midwest Region ASM

2010-03-14T20:34:00.002-04:00

Here's Midwest:

Kansas (1) - 21.6
Maryland (4) - 15.0
Ohio State (2) - 14.6
Georgetown (3) - 13.6
Tennessee (6) - 12.2
Michigan State (5) - 12.1
Georgia Tech (10) - 10.9
UNLV (8) - 10.6
Northern Iowa (9) - 9.7
Oklahoma State (7) - 9.5
San Diego State (11) - 9.4
Houston (13) - 5.8
Ohio (14) - 5.4
UC Santa Barbara (15) - 0.9

South Region ASM

2010-03-14T20:31:00.002-04:00

Here's the South Region

Duke (1) - 21.0
Utah State (12) - 14.4
Baylor (3) - 14.0
California (8) - 13.6
Purdue (4) - 13.1
Villanova (2) - 12.6
St. Mary's (10) - 12.6
Texas A&M (5) - 11.5
Old Dominion (11) - 11.4
Louisville (9) - 10.9
Siena (13) - 10.1
Notre Dame (6) - 9.3
Richmond (7) - 9.0
Sam Houston State (14) - 6.5

West Region ASM

2010-03-14T20:27:00.003-04:00

Here's the West Region as the ASM sees it:

Syracuse (1) - 18.2
BYU (7) - 17.4
Kansas State (2) - 15.9
Minnesota (11) - 13.1
Xavier (6) - 13.0
UTEP (12) - 12.6
Murray State (13) - 12.3
Florida State (9) - 12.0
Butler (5) - 11.7
Vanderbilt (4) - 11.3
Gonzaga (8) - 10.8
Pittsburgh (3) - 10.5
Florida (10) - 8.9
Oakland (14) - 3.5
Vermont (16) - 3.2
North Texas (15) - 1.6

Sunday! Sunday! Sunday!

2010-03-12T21:10:00.002-05:00

Or maybe Monday...

the return of the almighty ASM. And efficiency margin. And my new "creation" the adjusted efficiency margin.

The good news: lots of data to make your NCAA pool picks.

The bad news: Duke looks pretty good.

Hey, Snyder...

2010-03-08T22:19:00.003-05:00

...what do you know about fishing for king salmon either in the Salmon River or in Lake Ontario during the fall? My dad's barber showed him some pictures of huge salmon allegedly caught in the Salmon River, so now my dad is trying to set up a fishing trip for this fall. He recently heard that the fishing is even better for the big salmon in Ontario itself. So, I thought I would tap a local resource for knowledge....

Sad news...

2010-03-05T22:35:00.002-05:00

All: Good evening from Shorewood, IL. I write with a heavy heart to share the news that Cherie's dad, Rich Raven, has passed away after fighting prostate cancer for several years.

He entered the University of Chicago Medical Center Wednesday after being hit with an opportunistic pneumonia infection in the wake of his latest chemotherapy session. Cherie and I flew out to Chicago Wednesday afternoon when it became apparent that the infection was life-threatening.

The entire family rallied to his bedside, and we said our goodbyes yesterday evening. Despite struggling for every breath, he was in strong voice and good humor right up until his last words. After goodbyes, he looked at all of us, smiled and said, "Everybody ready for a square dance?" -- his mom and dad, long passed, had been big square dancers, and it was his way of telling us that he was ready to go see them. He closed his eyes, and began the process of winding down his life.

He never said another word.

This afternoon, while Cherie and I spelled other family members who needed a nap and a shower, he calmly exhaled his last breath and drifted away.

Rich was a truly good man who I felt fortunate to know. At 18, he joined the Air Force and served his country during the Vietnam War as an aircraft mechanic. Among other aircraft, he worked on the planes that dropped Agent Orange, which was believed to be responsible for the multiple cancers he fought during his lifetime and which eventually killed him.

He returned home to a career in telecommunications, starting as a lineman for Illinois Bell, and rising through the ranks of Illinois Bell and Ameritech, eventually becoming a project manager responsible for directing some of Chicago's biggest telco projects, including the cutover to a new 911 system for the city of Chicago, the 1994 World Cup, and the 1996 Democratic National Convention. He retired after concluding his career as a teacher for Telcordia (once part of SAIC, Matt) when his health no longer allowed him to withstand the rigors of teaching and travel.

My favorite aspect of Rich's personality was his penchant for telling interesting stories. Whether it was his time in basic training in Biloxi, working on bombers at McConnell AFB, avoiding electrocution while working on telephone lines during raging storms, standing up against Democratic Party officials with unreasonable demands, or standing on the turf at Soldier Field being honored for his work, Rich was always ready with a fascinating story that nearly always concluded with, "...and that was pretty big stuff for a kid whose dad had parked buses for the CTA!"

But most of all, I will miss hearing him say to my children, "Grampa loves you!" It breaks my heart that they will never hear that again.

If any of you are interested, donations in lieu of flowers can be sent in his memory by check to the University of Chicago Medical Center Cancer Research Foundation at:

5841 South Maryland Avenue, MC 1140; Chicago, IL 60637

The Malt Shop Brings All the Boys to the Yard (of former Congressmen)

2010-02-24T18:10:00.002-05:00

We missed the six year anniversary. And to think, Milk Shakes meant so much more back then.

Guess where I am?

2010-02-18T17:58:00.002-05:00

If you guessed the land of weisswurst, the Allgauer Alps, great bier, rahm und wiener schnitzel, schokolade, hot teutonic ski bunnies, and amazing alpine scenery, you guessed correctly.

GERMANY, biatches! GERMANY GERMANY GERMANY GERMANY! Eat it, and come back for seconds!

3 more days of Schneiderweisse, kaiserschmarrn, semmelknodel, Ayinger, Edinger, Schneider, Franziskaner, pommes frites, broetchen, and various foods smothered in cream sauces. Yum.

GOT-TO-LOVE-IT.

Das ist alles. Auf Wiedersehen, dummkopfs.

Oh, and Josh? Congratulations on the birth of Jackson Marley. Jackson Marley? Really? Are you actively trying to get him beat up in middle school? Sheesh.

Ha, just kidding. Congrats to you and Nik. Can't wait to meet the little tyke.

Atlanta Progressive News fires reporter for trying to be objective

2010-02-18T16:03:00.000-05:00

Not a parody, apparently.

http://blogs.creativeloafing.com/freshloaf/2010/02/15/atlanta-progressive-news-fires-reporter-for-trying-to-be-objective/

Buzzed

2010-02-12T14:12:00.002-05:00

For those of you on gmail, you may have noticed the new feature "Buzz". I'm reserving judgement on it insofar as I didn't know I needed it and I'm not sure I want it. However, I do want to inform everyone that, unless it has been fixed, whatever you post here shows up in Buzz as coming from Josh.

If that's not a reason to post more here, I don't know what it is.

This weather...

2010-02-10T08:26:00.001-05:00

...officially sucks and blows. That is all.

Boo, you're terrible!

2010-02-08T21:48:00.004-05:00

Two thoughts:

1. As if it wasn't enough that we're already digging out from more than 2 feet of snow, the latest Winter Storm Warning at weather.com predicts another 10-20 inches starting tomorrow. I love snow, but this is a bit much even for me. You can see pics of what our area looks like here;

2. This past week revealed to me the failure of big box retailers to move nimbly in response to local and regional phenomena. It's been no surprise for the last few weeks that the Mid-Atlantic is in an "active" pattern of winter weather destined to continue dumping snow on the DC-MD-VA area (and PA, NJ, NY, NC, etc.). Yet no big box store/national retailer I entered (Target, Toys R Us, Wal-Mart, EMS, REI, etc.) in the past week stocked sleds -- in fact, they had already transitioned their sporting goods departments to spring/summer items. Really, who's thinking of buying softball and baseball bats when you've had snow twice in a week and are staring down the Great Blizzard of 2010?

Anyway, at the last moment on Friday morning, when I'd nearly given up hope, my brother said, "Have you tried the hardware store?" Sure enough, local institution Fischer Hardware was stocked to the gills with sleds, snow shovels, and other winter necessities. I'll be patronizing them more often in the future.

The passing of an era/This one's for you, Josh...

2010-01-31T16:23:00.004-05:00

Back when DVD was new and Josh and I shared a soundproofed apartment (thanks, proximity to National Airport!), I purchased the components for a home theater. Josh and I (and some of you faithful readers) spent many hours with the sound cranked up to "earth-shaking", munching bad pizza from Domino's and watching Gladiator or the Matrix or Heat or Fight Club, or some other testosterone-infused moving picture containing lots of ass-kicking, gunfire, explosions, roaring tigers, or other such manly goodness.

Today, the DVD player component of that rig, the venerable Sony DVP-S530D, finally bit the dust. It was 10 years old or more, and it finally succumbed to the infamous Sony "C 13 00" error, refusing to play discs of any kind.

So, I went to Best Buy and snagged a new Panasonic DMP-BD60 Blu-Ray player, which will nicely complement the flat screen HDTV I intend to purchase in the next week or two. I'm currently back and forth between a 46"/47" LCD TV (either Samsung, Sony, or LG) or a 50"/52" plasma (same brands). Anyone have any experience with these that they'd like to share?

The Voop's Enduring Power of Inspiration...

2010-01-30T22:26:00.003-05:00

The American University Eagles won their third straight and fourth in five games, taking down the first-place Lafayette Leopards with an impressive 10-point road win, 76-66. The Eagles are now only 1 game behind Lafayette for leadership of the Patriot Conference. Could the young Eagles be peaking at the right time, laying the groundwork for a run at the Patriot League title and a 3rd straight berth in the Big Dance?

Stay tuned...

Furrow in the melting snow leads Eagles to victory...

2010-01-17T23:06:00.003-05:00

The AU Eagles men's basketball team has been WOEFUL this season. Prior to today, they were 3-14, and had losses to Mount St. Mary's, Md. Eastern Shore, Fairfield, and UMBC among others.

Today, I stepped in to right the ship. Wielding the BFD, twirling it to engage that hypnotic "VOOP" sound, I guided the young Eagles to a state of self-confidence.

"Listen to the VOOP," I told them in a pre-game speech in the bowels of Bender Arena. "The VOOP wants to be victorious. The VOOP wants to you to dunk, to drain the 3, to rebound without mercy -- to excite the chubby, mediocre AU Spirit Dancers in their whorish red dresses that don't cover their too-big, too many late night chicken patty with french fries asses. It wants them to follow YOUR furrows in the snow. Now get out there and make it happen!"

The outcome: a 73-63 victory over the skinnier, white kids from Colgate.

I rest my case.

PS Stephen Lumpkins is the next Brian Gilmore. You heard it here first.

Anger at atrocious playcalling assuaged by Golden Tee domination...

2009-12-27T23:18:00.002-05:00

1. Memo to Wade Phillips: If you repeatedly cannot figure out how to get 3 feet or less on either 3rd or 4th down against the lowly Redskins after having the same exact problem 2 weeks ago, you're not going far in the playoffs.

2. Memo to Jason Garrett: There is no reason for a trick play when you are at midfield, up 14, and jamming the ball down the Skins' throats. Just keep jamming it, instead of putting your team in a 2nd and 23 and forcing it to take unnecessary risks that result in turnovers.

3. Memo to the faithful: my anger at the atrocious playcalling and execution that kept the Cowboys from what should have been a 42-0 demolition of the Redskins was assuaged by the fact that I HOUSED Mr. Close in back-to-back matches of Golden Tee at the Buffalo Wild Wings in Warrenville, IL. Pictures will follow after I download them from my phone.

Merry Christmas to all.

I Saw AU beat DePaul

2009-12-17T00:05:00.001-05:00

And I did a running diary of it.

Impersonal Delivery of News

2009-12-08T10:55:00.001-05:00

So I started out with the goal of contacting people personally, but it turns out that this is much easier. So here it is: my wife is pregnant.

I truly couldn't be happier and can't wait until June 29. Everything has been good so far and we're doing everything we can to make sure it stays that way.

Cross-posted at that other blog

Not looking good for the Eagles...

2009-11-19T13:52:00.003-05:00

The AU Men's Basketball team dropped its 3rd game in a row last night, losing 73-62 to Mount St. Mary's. Yes, we got creamed by Mount St. Mary's. We've now lost consecutive games to St. Francis, Albany, and Mount St. Mary's. It's not looking like a Patriot League Championship year for the Eagles.

I knew this would be a rebuilding year, but I had hoped after the last couple of years and our berths in the Big Dance, our recruiting classes would be strong enough to avoid this poor a start. Oh, well, it least it will be cheap Saturday afternoon entertainment for the munchkins, who will get to hear their dad yell, "Boo, you're terrible, Papparo!"

Behold a great twitter feed

2009-11-16T17:51:00.002-05:00

A friend at work pointed me towards the greatest fake twitter feed since Barack's Teleprompter started its:

The Fake AP Stylebook

Among my favorites:

Avoid using "gadzooks," lest your monocle pop out and land in your jar of mustache wax.
The antecedent for "she" in "that's what she said" is generally understood to be "your mom."
Use the suffix "-ista" to describe someone famous who doesn't really do anything.

Please read.

That night...

2009-11-10T21:56:00.002-05:00

...for those of you who remember how Cherie and I painted our apartments at Columbia Crossing, the Seven Corners Home Depot, where FBI employee Linda Franklin was gunned down by John Allan Muhammad and Lee Boyd Malvo, was "our" Home Depot. It was the store we drove to again and again for paints, brushes, tarps, and the occasional impulse soda buy at the register.

We were headed there that night for more paint. But it had been a long and frustrating day, I was tired, and I convinced Cherie to turn off the path to Home Depot and head back to the apartment. Not long after arriving at home, I turned on the TV and saw the news about Franklin's murder at the very place toward which we'd been headed. Who knows, maybe it saved one of our lives that night. That was what was so frightening about those weeks -- the random nature of the killings and the knowledge that you were totally at the mercy of chance -- maybe it would be you while pumping gas, maybe not.

So good riddance, Muhammad. I hope that even unconscious, you felt your breath slip away. I hope you felt panic at the control taken away from you, at the certainty of your impending death. Like Dennis Miller said, some fuckers are just too evil to be allowed to stay on this earth. Tonight, you joined their ranks.

Chron 990

2009-11-05T12:16:00.002-05:00

As an alumnus of both The American University and The Chronicle of Higher Education (I am proud of one of those right now)... and as a longtime PR person who was once responsible for pushing The Chronicle's "editorial choices" on to other publications so that they could make the same "disappointing" decisions to publish this factual information...

This letter from our alumni association president looks like a serious case of the university's institutional advancement machine stepping on its own dick.

I bet this wasn't the PR folks' idea, and I feel kind of bad for them. Campaign must not be going well.

From: aualum=american.edu@reply.bronto.com on behalf of AU Alumni Association
To: Matthew Snyder
Subject: Important Message from Your Alumni Association President
Date: Wednesday, November 04, 2009 7:14:19 PM

Dear fellow alumni,

I am writing you today as proud as ever to be an alumnus of American University, and with great confidence in the students, faculty, and leadership of our shared alma mater.

In your local paper, online, or in national publications such as the Wall Street Journal or New York Times, you may have noticed a story that referenced a report in the Chronicle of Higher Education regarding presidential compensation in higher education. Annually, the Chronicle collects and compares data as listed on publicly available IRS Forms 990. On Monday, the Chronicle published a story using the data from 2007–2008, which reported that AU president Neil Kerwin, SPA/BA ’71, received $1,419,339 in total compensation in 2008, ranking third highest in the nation.

Eagle to eagle, you should know that this report of Dr. Kerwin’s income is misleading. Dr. Kerwin’s annual salary, $559,067 in FY2008, historically ranks third among the seven presidents of private research universities in Washington and is moderate in relation to presidents at private universities. The total reported included deferred compensation ($481,304) and investment growth ($318,864) that Dr. Kerwin earned over nearly a decade during his service as provost and interim president. He was required to take the payout when the funds vested, consistent with board policy. It is important to note that each year of the deferred compensation was previously reported on IRS 990 forms and prior surveys as a benefit.

I hope you are able to take a moment to review a communication from AU Board Chairman Gary M. Abramson, SPA/BA ’68, on this subject here.

On behalf of the AU Alumni Association Board, I would like to express my disappointment for the editorial choices utilized by the Chronicle and, subsequently, by other news outlets. During his tenure, Dr. Kerwin has led the university to tremendous financial and academic success and the board’s compensation is especially focused on competitive, market-based compensation that is not excessive. I am proud to be serving as Alumni Board President during this time. I hope that this information is helpful to you, and I encourage you to maintain an open and honest dialogue with your alma mater.

Thank you for your time and consideration.

Sincerely,Brian F. Keane

X-treme townies

2009-10-26T13:26:00.002-04:00

I can't see this happening at the Shoppe (where would you park it?), but this sure beats having a Dallas Cowgirls post at the top of the page:

Man pleads guilty to DWI in motorized La-Z-Boy
A Minnesota man has pleaded guilty to driving his motorized La-Z-Boy chair while drunk. A criminal complaint says 62-year-old Dennis LeRoy Anderson told police he left a bar in the northern Minnesota town of Proctor on his chair after drinking eight or nine beers.

Planet Moron, a kindred spirit if ever there was one, has more.

Tony Romo haters...

2009-10-25T22:21:00.002-04:00

can suck eggs....

Stop blogging now!

2009-10-23T08:10:00.003-04:00

Or so says (sort of) friend of the Shoppe, Adam Keiper in his book review in the WSJ:

But what's so bad about a little self-censorship? It may prove safer for those of us who leave no moment unphotographed, no heartbreak or health scare unblogged, and no thought un-tweeted. And it may also help reawaken us to the quiet pleasures of private life.

I was...

2009-10-18T23:42:00.002-04:00

...going to post something about the pathetic, inept Washington Redskins, but even as a Cowboys fan, it's just not fun to dump on them anymore. What a sad state of affairs.

Cap'n Lou, we hardly knew ya...

2009-10-14T17:10:00.002-04:00

Rest in peace, my favorite rubber-band covered wrestling promoter. I hope you and the Ultimate Warrior enjoy some Budweiser up in heaven.

Hello in there...

2009-10-14T15:47:00.002-04:00

...and greetings from mobalicious Utica, NY...

The Chapins, Maine Style...

2009-10-06T13:06:00.002-04:00

Because I was tired of seeing that other post, and because I have the cutest kids on the planet....

Story of my career...

2009-09-23T22:42:00.005-04:00

Client, 6 weeks ago: You've done a great job, Brian, and so has your team. We're going to extend your contract for a year.

Client, 4 weeks ago: You've done a great job, Brian, but the people who promised the $$ to fund your contract extension lied, so we don't have the $$ to fund your extension. But, we'll extend your contract 2 months until we figure something out.

Client, 3 weeks ago: You've done a great job, Brian, but we can't find the $$. We'll extend your contract 1 month until we figure something out.

Client, 2 weeks ago: You've done a great job, Brian, but we can't find the $$. We'll extend your contract 14 days until we figure something out.

Client, last week: You've done a great job, Brian, but we can't find the $$. Your contract expires on Monday, and that's it, you're done.

Client, last week: Oh, by the way, my boss found some $$, but he wants to give it to another contractor who claims they can do the work.

Another contractor, today: We can't do the work, so we'll advertise for it.

God Bless Detroit Tigers fans...

2009-09-19T21:42:00.003-04:00

Earlier tonight, I took a quick look at home park attendance figures for Major League baseball. I was stunned to read that 16 of MLB's 30 franchises have been filling (on average) less than 60% of their seating capacity during home dates.

But, in Detroit, where we all know that the economy has been craptastic for most of the last 30 years, and especially so the last few years, the Tigers have managed to fill the park to 78% of capacity this year, putting them just out of the top 10 in attendance, and ahead of 19 other franchises. Unbelievable.

And Milwaukee does even better, averaging 89% sold during home dates! Is it just that there's nothing else to do in Milwaukee?

Also of note -- I always imagined that the strength of Red Sox Nation would mean that it would be #1 in average road attendance. But, the #1 team in MLB road attendance? The Chicago Cubs. Of course, I should add that they're helped by the fact that the NL Central contains 3 of the top 10 most-attended teams in all of MLB.

Finally, this sad fact -- the Atlanta Braves average 58% of capacity sold at home...73% on the road. Pathetic.

Mark Grace is no Kazimierz Michalski

2009-09-19T08:35:00.002-04:00

From The UK's Daily Mail, we learn that a 101 year old bested a 47 year old would be thief:

A 101-year-old war veteran caught a would-be burglar by holding him in a ferocious bear hug and watched him turn red and gasp for breath.
...
"I am not as quick and decisive these days but I was much stronger physically than him.
"I used to be a boxer and I wish I was few years younger and quicker, then things would have been very different. I would have massacred his face.

Polish veteran of WWII, boxer, librarian, vigilante...role model.

Mark Grace is awesome...

2009-09-18T21:47:00.000-04:00

...because he "owns" her....

Yes, Chris...

2009-09-09T23:40:00.003-04:00

...BearingPoint did an exceptional job of "lowering overhead" -- lowered it right out of existence, along with the company!

All kidding aside, yes, I too was disappointed in the President's speech. Mainly I was disappointed that it came tonight and not several months ago. His references to "...the plan I'm announcing tonight....", and "Now is the season for action," left me asking, "Where the hell has this plan been for the last several months while you've left Congress to dither??? Why wasn't the season for action 3 months ago?"

I also thought President Obama lost an opportunity with people who want to support our President but who have lost faith in him to exercise some humility and state outright that he has been too passive in this effort, and that he has failed completely to articulate (before tonight) his plan for health care.

He made health care reform a top priority (leaving aside for the moment the strong argument that there were and remain many other top, and expensive, priorities), and then apparently sat idly by watching as the Congressional cockfight over health care likely ruined any chance for reforming a system that all of us agree needs fixing in several areas.

Now, here he comes, the supreme rooster, feathers shining, strutting into the fray, with his grandiose calls to action -- "...I intend to be the last," "Now is the season for action," "Now is the time to deliver," "...we will meet history's test," -- UGH.

I want to support him, but tonight's speech smacks of (well, some bad, cliched speechwriting to start) a president out of touch, who as his biggest critics contend, is a big fan of speechmaking, but not much of a fan of real, actual work.

And yeah, the quip about "profits" being bad -- to me, smacks of stupid, misplaced class warfare -- the bottom line is, the President needs the cooperation and collaboration of the private health care industry to achieve any significant reform -- and calling them out again as the bogeyman isn't going to help him.

I hope I'm wrong. He's our President -- I want to believe him and believe in him. I want for our country to make changes to our health care system that will improve it. I hope he understands that he has mismanaged this effort, that sitting back and now strutting into the fray has not been a helpful approach, and that he intends to (to use another cliche) roll up his sleeves and get down to the dirty, detailed business of working with Congress to craft useful legislation. But, I'm not optimistic.

PS, we're coming to Chicagoland again Sep 27 - Oct 2. Prepare for another visit to BWW, and to conjure up some good ideas for wagers on your predictions on the performance of my fantasy football team, 'cause 4-8-1? Them's is fightin' words.